NOTE:

Dear visitor (if there is any) please note the following: The blog "Broken Radius" is hosted at Google Blogger's server. I can therefore not guarantee that your visit to the blog or any comment you write wont be recorded by the NSA. If you have any worries about this, you can visit instead my alternative blog Letters-to-a-Persian-Cat. This one is hosted at a European server which hopefully acknowledges visitors privacy.

24.6.11

Love in the Era of Social Networking

Ghazal my Dear,

About a year ago we were sitting at the bone fire on the bank of the Isar river and I was badly condeming destiny for beeing so cruel to me by sending you here, the most fascinating and inspiring person I ever met, but at an too young age to get closer with somebody like me who was in his fourties already. There at the river bank, laying on the peble stones and talking open about our dreams and about science and life, you remember I told you how little I could understand your confession that - except for a school-mate - you only had boy-friends that you met at internet dating-sites. My suggestion to you, just to wait until a real brave and strong person approaches you in a coffee or in the train or at the university, without going through all this cyber-dating proceedure could not convince you much, even though I argued that this short relationship that we have here in Munich (you call it friendship, for me it is a bit more)is the best example that two people can still meet each other outside the cyber-world. The fact that I simply went to you after the lectures and never hesitated to invite from then on almost every day to go out, without having ever seen your Facebook identity, this you obviously considered an exception. Maybe you saw me as a social fossil, or an immoral person who stands outside the social networks.

Zoe Margolis, writer of the blog "Girl with a one-track mind" and author of a book with the same name (under her pseudonym Abby Lee) wrote a remarkable witty and obviously experienced essay about the evolution of a relationship in the era of social networking. It shows that it is so damned easy to turn a loos exchange of some thoughts with a so-called "friend" at Facebook into a more and more privat and intimate relationship. Because it is just words, ideas, and maybe photos that are exchanged, one never has to present itself in his entire personality. The social networks are almost invented to polish a personal identity from all unwanted details. It starts with the very simple thing as a photograph on your privat page. It usually shows you at a younger age, at very could conditions, sometimes after sophisticated Photoshop work. One of the obvious examples is Zoe Margolis Blog-page itself: Whereas in reality in front of a TV camera she appeares as a mature, self-confident woman, her blog autobiography shows her on a college girl style picture. I"m not trying to make any judgement here about which of the two appears more attractive (this as usually lays in the eye of the viewer), for sure the two images almost show two different characters. And as there are these huge uncertainties to find out how somebody looks in reality, if you only know him through social networks, the rest of your web identity is usually also a reflection of how you would like to be, rather than what you really are.
Zoe Margolis describes in her short essay in a very clear and pointed way how sooner or later the real person behind the web identity has to unvail itself, if the relation gets closer and closer. And a relationship goes trough a difficult, not so say catastrophic time if confronted with these torn images. How hard it is and how painful if the social network link suddenly dries out.
Zoe Margolis describes this as following:

"Once upon a time, outside the social network of the Internet, you’d just shrug if someone dropped communication and accept that if they really wanted to stay in contact, they’d simply pick up the 'phone and say hello. But in the web of modern interactivity, where you get used to the regular loud chatter of the (false?) intimacy of the social network, the sudden distance and silence from someone you’ve connected with on a frequent and personal basis is –ironically – deafening."

21.6.11

This country deserves more than material wealth ------ A debate

Amir Parviz (for a secular Monarchy in Iran)

I find too many Iranians living in the west are solely influenced by western propaganda, which I define as media being produced by the UK/Israel/France/Germany/USA and their junior affiliates, Poland, Italy, Spain etc.
Look at the information we know for sure...
Iran used to give loans in the Billions to Germany, USA, UK, France during Shahs time. Iran could not spend the wealth it was creating quickly enough, it was cash rich.
Those same countries, western democracies, portrayed the shah a despot, crook, tyrant, megalomaiNIAC, corrupt etc, etc, etc.
So the same Iran and Shah they could not hold back economically or rob, by using manipulation, deceit and coercion they destroyed. The style of effective Propaganda was specifically designed for Iranians and their village gossip way of dealing with life.
What is clear is the Shah would not sign off on corruption and never accepted a No as far as technology or development for Iranians by any nation.
Today these same countries USA/Germany/France/UK with the IMF give loans/debt to democratic goverments they have can have a big influence on, and their leaders are not called corrupt megalomaniacs, but great countries... what a joke..
Look at the level of debt their democratic governments have incurred.
Greece "$485 Billion Dollars"
Ireland "$1,045 Billion Dollars"
Spain "$1,100 Billion Dollars"
Italy "$1,100 Billion Dollars"
And Iranians want to pursue a DEMOCRATIC future.... what a dirty , even perverse joke in comparison to what Ira was honestly during the time of the late shah, today we see arguments are won with out right lies. So you don't have the ability to choose based on the truth. You can only choose based on deceit and manipulation. Is that what you think will serve Iranians?
It is no wonder these countries and their leaders are not called despotic tyranies, even when we know they participated in secret torture chambers by of the CIA. Is this the type of free worlds mass media we want for Iran? These periferal countries do not serve their own people but serve the USA/Germany/France/UK, all nuclear super powers. During the Shahs time Iran was poised to overtake all of these countries except for the USA economically speaking.
No wonder the USA and it's partners wanted the IRI for Iran and now lead Iranians to seeking more democracy for IRAN. Democracy is code for control and foreign domination. As Russia discovered under Yeltsin, which is why the russian secret service brought Putin and now yet again the so called free world media is used to attack putin "saying he is corrupt" but the truth is the exact opposite as we can see from russia's success.
Iranians used to chant Freedom, Independence, Islamic Republic, clearly we were independent and free, it was those things that the west stole from us by removing the Shah at our own deceived hands. It was exactly because we had a king that was involved in politics upto the neck that Iran did not suffer the same fate as all these countries and Iran under the shah served Iranians and was independent. It was progressing because he served honestly and without corruption, unfortunately the Iranian people due to disingenuous reporting on issues of human rights stopped trusting the Shah.
My view based on what information I have is Iran needs a Shah that should have his hands in politics and that we leave Irans politics to polticians seeking power at our own peril. That is assuming we are serious on how to make Iran a Champion leading country, like it was under the Shah.
Those that want a multi-party system without an arbitror like the Shah are talikng based on what information. Shouldn't responsible people look at both sides of the equation, not just what it is that Iranians say they want, but also looking at what that desire will create in reality. Isn't it dangerous to ignore key information, regarding what a democracy will really give birth to in Iran.
I strongly doubt a parliamentary democracy like the UK will create a leading country, a winning country, a country rich in splendour like Iran was in the late 60's and early 70's, especially because that is the easiest way to be dominated, when strong democratic institutions do not exist. I feel people don't have information and are influenced by propaganda make stupid decisions. Sadly they put their lives behind those decisions. But I'd like other knowledge and expertise on this subject of restoring freedom and justice for Iranians.

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Reply by Radius

Amir, I dont care about the impressiv economical figures that you present here. Whatever you wrote about national income and debts and loans, thats not the problem of the people of Iran. I guess in this matter, they are doing much better than a lot of other countries in the middle east.
What the people of Iran deserve, and what is all the political unrest about at the moment is freedom in the first instance. The green movement is mainly based on the young generation, and their concern is not material wellfare. If this would be the main issue, You would rather see the older generation on the streets. 
What frustrates the young and innovative generation in Iran is the political and ideological oppression, that is absolutely toxic to creativity. It destroys their dreams. Don"t compare Iran (under Shah or under the ajatollahs) with debt-loaden european countries. Compare it with Israel, for instance. Israel is not really rich, and the material living standard might be much lower than for instance in Saudi Arabia or some european countries.  But the gouvernment in Israel knows exactly that the best thing you can give to your people and to make them loyal is freedom of thoughts and ideas. People in Israel dont think their country is heaven on earth, but it allows them to work on their dreams, some of them are gorgious, other might be funny, others might be silly. But Israel can beat every other nation in the world by its creativity output (scientific, technological, cultural). But you can get this only if you give freedom to the people. This is why totalitarian regimes fall behind sooner or later in science and technology. Ask why all our new technologies, GSM, GPS, internet, satellites, biotech, modern transportation, chemistry, pharmceuticals were invited in "free countries" like the europeans, US, Japan ? I tell you there is nothing genetically, the people from arab countries or china or russia are not less intelligent or innovative. But to rise this creative potential, they had to leave their country and try it in US or europe. There is also no link between a high living standard and creativity, otherwise we would see most of high tech coming from countries like SA, Emirates, Singapoor, Lichtenstein or Monacco. 
Creativity, which on the long term is the only thing bringing happiness and satisfaction to man, needs free spirits in an open world.
And this is why (thanks god) totalitarian regimes only seem to be made for eternity, but never survive for very long. If you keep your people in mental custody, their loyality will erode quickly.
And therefor what I wish to the Iranian people after the IRI went to the scrap-yard of History is not the type of material wealth and intellectual degradation like in SA or Emirates, but I wish them a liberation of ideas and creativity. Material wealth will come automatically with it.
And whether a "secular monarchy" is more likely to guarantee this (as in UK or skandinavia) or a grassroot democracy is more appropriate (like in switzerland) is hard to tell from the outside and depends on tradition and mentallity. I agree with you that western-style democracy can not be taken as a "conditio sine qua non" for a new Iran. I also agree with you that the global power-players should stop trying to exploit Iran for their purposes. They did this for too long time, and what the english and russians and americans considered THEIR Great Game prepared the ground for the unjustice under which the iranian people have to suffer for too long time now.



Radius, that is another point of mine (Amir Parveniz)

I believe that what people really want is FREEDOM and this is what was stolen from Iranians as a result of the revolution, which is why it was such a true pity it occured. If we as Iranians pursue Democracy, then i believe we will lose our ability to have freedom.

Whereas, if we pursue a secular monarchy, the Institution by virtue of what it can accomplish against foreign domination and their exploitation of political parties in 3rd world countries like ours will unlike a democratic govt help people accomplish freedom. Just like it existed and was growing every day during the 1970's with the late Shah.

Consider the Voice of America Show funded by the US goverment, Parazit, which at the begining says Azadi, Edalat, Democracy, Barabari, Jameheyeh madani. I feel that as the US Government tries to popularize the concept of democracy for Iranians a people with no institutions for it, their aim is not to help us restore freedom for Iranians. Which is a totally different subject. The USA already undermined freedom from Iranians once before, when will Iranians learn? They are behind and support muslim fundamentalism.

While I don't agree with alot of what this Journalist Mr Evans has to say, conclusions, I agree that his facts are accurate... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SpHAe70ohEk . The truth is it has been US foreign policy to maintainand expand fundamentalism, both parties liberals and republicans.

The goal of all Iranians should be freedom and justice first, this is more easily brought about by a sovereign, than groups of politicians attempting to share power.



Monarchy or Parlamentary Democracy (Radius)
Dear Amir Parviz, There is not much to contradict from your last post, I have to admit. My yesterdays comment requesting a free society for the iranian people is perhaps a very long term aim. It is nothing that can be guaranteed from the next morning after the ajatollahs are removed from power. My hope that Iran will face a future in Freedom, with same civil rights for everybody and a prosperous economy is shared by the majority of people here. But at the moment, it is like a dream, and even when the green movement overcomes the IRI regime, it will be a long and stony way to get there. In particular, one has to face the problem that all the supporters of IRI, the Basidj, Revolutionary Guards, Pazdaran, Sepah and all the others who currently benefit from the regime, that they might resist a new liberal society. It is hard to tell what it needs to make them loyal to a new, liberal gouvernment, if they loose all their privileges. In the best case (what I hope) there really might be a peaceful transformation like in post-war germany or the eastern european countries after fall of communism. Here, the former elite lost its influence (theoretically, but in some countries just converted into the new economic players). Ideally, they should face trials, not neccesarrily to punish them, but to clear and document what had happened and what was their function and help them to finding a way into the new society.

In the worst case, the former elite could go in the underground and start an endless fight against the new system. Usually the risk for the later is very high if there is no new identification, just as in Iraq of Afghanistan, where the US-backed Hamid Kazai or el-Maliki are considered puppets of the foreign powers and democracy as we said yesterday just a tool to rule the country from the outside. This is the reason why so many support the Taliban or partisan and sectarian groups there. Nobody respects the new rulers. In particular, if you have a multi-ethnic society with religious and cultural heterogeneity, what is even more pronounced in Iran due to its rich and long history.

There is no way around a strong personality at the top, at least for the first years after the political changes. This personality must be respected by all ethnic groups and must protect minorities and all religious groups equally. And for this I could really follow your idea of a secular monarchy. I agree that a strong Shah would be the best guarantee to unify the country and protect freedom and civil rights for everybody. Otherwise he/she will face again resistance and illoyality from religious leaders, who in Iran like in any other country always believe that they have their own rights and values.

But a modern monarchy simply cannot work like the european courts hundred years ago or the persian empire under Xerxes or Darious, where autocracy was the most efficient form of ruling a country. I think an efficient parlament is essential to give the people the feeling that the new system works in their own interest rather than in the particular interest of a dynasty. I think there are plenty of examples that a constitutionally monarchy as in skandinavian countries or UK or even Marocco can provide a long term stable society with the best ballance between personal freedom, responsibility for the whole country and certain degree of security. This is what I hope for a future Iran as well.




20.6.11

Happy Birthday, Ghazal !

Whatever you were dreaming of, my Dear, I wish you will get today.
And all the things that you are still waiting for, they might come later but still on time. The few ones that will never come were probably not important at all.
Make the best out of everything that you already got, Ghazal, it is so much and it is precious.

I wish you good luck with everything.
I hope that life provides you the same 
amount of inspiration that you gave to me.




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Hello Michael!!

Thank you so much for your birthday wishes and the nice music! You are very talented, I liked the music.
I really hope everything is fine with you. I saw M. in Stockholm, he told me you are fine and that you are trying to publish. Good luck with that.

Wish you all the best.

Take care

/Ghazal

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Dear Ghazal,
It was so nice reading your messsage. I hope you had a wonderful birthday party and got all the flowers and beautiful presents that you liked and lovely guests.
Thank you so much, Asal, for your encouraging words about the guitar music. I"m not sure, if you really liked it or you just tried to say something nice. But in any case, your comment made me very happy.
Take Care, Michael

18.6.11

Frank Zappas rock opera inspired by the 1979 islamic "revolution"

To all Swedish Zappa Afficionados: enjoy the post today and the rest of May 2012.
Sorry for the two blocked Zappa Videos below. I'll try to change them to free versions soon.
If you enjoy, leave a message or comment.

Dear Michael,
do you remember the CD you gave me last year with the compilation of some rock, pop and jazz music? In fact I never really  had  time to listen to it while I lived in the Helmholtz Guesthouse. Last year in Munich I was so busy with other things, with my MSc project and learning the complicate mouse genetics, I also felt homesick for Sweden and my parents and therefore only listened to persian music. And of course, every other free moment you have been around and drove with me to the river bank and the beach, to nice restaurants and music-clubs and theater and many more. It was a busy time, you know, and hence the CD compilation got somehow lost among many other silverplates with scientific stuff and photographs and lecture hand outs.
Today in the evening, my brother found this CD and was attracted by the hand written label on it: 20th century rock music. He put it into his stereo and turned on the volume, and there started a nice song, very easy listening style, but I never heard it before. My dad immediately listened up and called us all. He told us that this song "Bobby Brown goes Down" is by the great rock singer Frank Zappa, who already in 1979 foresaw that the so-called "islamic revolution" in his home Iran will end in a cultural dictatorship. My dad just asked me to send you his warmest regards for introducing this intelligent, brave and tallented musician to his daughter.
(and I have to say sorry for not listening to the music on the CD before).

Take Care, Michael, I hope you are doing fine.
/ghazal

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Ghazal, my dear,

I think me and your dad would have a lot in common, in particular if it comes to politics. Your dad, however was obviously much more strikt in his decisions, and left the totalitarian regime in Iran, whereas myself always tried to find a niche in the east-german pseudo-democracy. And Frank Zappa, whom we could easily listen to via west-Berlin radiostations, was part of the entertainment in this socio-political niche.

Frank Zappa was one of the most innovative and influential, but also controversal rock-musicians. His huge oevre covered jazz-rock classics like “Peaches in Regalia” , but also some top ten hits like  “Don’t eat that yellow snow” and “Bobby Brown goes Down” from the 1979 album “Sheigh Sherbouti”.




Zappa always acknowledged his music being influenced by 20th century classic music, in particular by composers Igor Stravinsky and Edgar Varese.  In 1970 Zappa met Zubin Mehta, conductor of LA Philharmony Orchestra and descendent of an indian Parsi family. Zappas Mothers of Invention and Mehtas Orchestra played together the concert 200 Motels

Even though his lyrics became more and more complex, and political messages woven into  satirical stories, Zappa never led any doubt what he thought about the Washington establishment and religious bigotry. In the video to the fusion-jazz piece “You are what you is” he calls Ronald Reagan a president from hell. I was always wondering how Zappa, wouldn’t he have died too early in 1993, could bear to live in a country that 10 years later was lead and send to war by the lunatic George W. Bush.   On September 19, 1985, Zappa testified before the United States Senate Commerce, Technology, and Transportation committee, attacking the “Parents Music Resource Center” (PMRC), a music organization co-founded by Tipper Gore, wife of then-senator Al Gore. The PMRC consisted of many wives of politicians, including the wives of five members of the committee, and was founded to address the issue of song lyrics with sexual or satanic content. Zappa saw their activities as on a path towards censorship. His high sensitivity for political oppression was seen during production of the 1979 triple LP Joe's Garage,  comprising a rock opera about the danger of political systems, the suppression of freedom of speech and music. Inspired in by the Islamic revolution that had made music illegal within its jurisdiction at the time, it also addressed the "strange relationship Americans have with sex and sexual frankness".


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Whether one likes Zappas very open political statements, denouncing the hypocrisis of the western moral standards and their corruption by the political system, or not, whether you think his language is sexist and chauvinistic or just right to fight the political correctness, one thing about him remains that nowbody can deny:  That he was one, if not the most productive, independent, intelligent and influential musicians of the 20s century.  It is sad that he died before experiencing how a new generation of iranians will reinstall freedom, music and creativity in Tehran. I'm sure he would have greeted the green movement with highest sympathy.   Enjoy and share with your friends and family !

It is pitty you are so far now, so we cannot go to a concert this summer.
Hope for the future,
Enjoy anyhow, TAKE CARE, Ghazal
Michael



17.6.11

Political Power, Sex and the 21st Century E-Communication

Anthony Weiner, highly praised democrate representative and candidate for N.Y. mayor resigned this week over his cyber-sex affair that is in the media since may. Mr Weiners activities outside his office duties, which involved sending explicit photographs of his most precious body areas to several femal followers through Twitter and Facebook are still difficult to judge in terms of their moral or political implications, both for his political peers and voters but even more for his wife Huma Abedin. Are they really as immoral as the Washington Times tries to makes us believe, or is this media outcry rather a hypocracy when it comes to our own secret phantasies, that we like to forbid to those who are paid with our tax money ?  I"m wondering what would happened if Mr. Weiner would not have send his "Bulge" pictures and "Shaved Breast" pictures and testosteron-loaded short messages to younger ladies or university students, but to elder house-wives or congress representatives of the republicians ?  Would have Mrs. Nancy Pelosi, congress speaker and his party fellow demanded his resignation with the same mercyless ?  It is really hard to tell how much Mr. Weiner must be considered a liar and therefore banned from the political establishment, or whether he is a victim of the Big Brother media establishment, who is regularily searching for fresh blood to drink.  I wont make any judgement here myself, I think it is about the people who voted for him as representative to decide over his future, and in particular it is about his wife Huma Abedin to consider if she wants to stay with him for the rest of their life.
What I like to suggest here, however is that Weiners affairs highlights the validity of an old issue: that of the erotic component that is related to power. In particular in the sphere of politics, that in Weiners case very simply ment that he had a sort of power over ~ 50 000 people that he represented of his New York district, power is easily gained by questionable personal qualities such as networking, bribing, lobbying. What comes with this political power is an ever increasing media presence, and it was especially the later that Anthony Weiner very obviously exploited for his cyber-sex relationships. If he would have used an anonymous user-name such as "dear-Mr-president" or "democrats-bulge" or "oral-bill" for his twitter and Facebook accounts, instead of clearly showing that it is Anthony Weiner here, your most appreciated and praised democrats futur NY mayor that sends you these steam-hot messages and pictures of his body parts, he would have received much less reponse for this, considering that the photos he send around showed a rather prude clerkes physiology (no tatoos or body piercings or scarves from gang fights or military combats). It was obviously this "added value" of offering his verbal sex and body pictures to young ladies in combination with the thrill of having all this "dirty stuff" with a guy whom the rest of the nation only knows as Mr. Super-Clean and everybodies darling. And for the failure of this attempt, i.e. exploiting a political function that has been given to somebody by his voters to attract femals for love affairs, I praise the public media who exposed this story.

15.6.11

Why I don"t feel any sorrow for you, Basidj



Yesterday, I saw your face in this documentary about the elections and post-election demonstrations in Tehran in June 2009. I saw your coward eyes under the black helmet, Basidj. Like all of the other black-dressed and heavily armed puppets of your leaders, you seemed to enjoy this feeling of total power over the students on the streets of Tehran, who had nothing else to defend against you than their T-shirts, canvas slipper and hand-written posters.
You felt so much superior, when you started to beat them and kick those who were already laying on the ground. You felt so powerful, fed with drugs by your fat and conscienceless commanders and equipped with the newest high-tech guns and tear-gas bullets and batons from the top weapons factories of the world. How did you felt, when you did your so-called job out there ? I guess you wanted to impress your commanders and the other members of your squad by the ruthlessness of your beating, by the precision of your shooting. But we all know that you are just a bloddy coward. You think you are strong in the moment when you torture and kill unarmed young people, mostly students, young women but also children and elder people. Did you felt satisfied for pleasing your coward commanders and the heads of this criminal gouvernment.
And when you saw how the bullets from your guns made the streets turn red, didn”t you thought that this is more thrilling than your ego-shooter computer game ? And how does it feel if you kick your steel-armed boots into the belly of somebody whom you first chained feets and arms with a cable ? Does it gives you an emotional blow to imagine how the steel covers of your boots causes pain and internal bleeding in the person laying on the ground in front of you ? Did you considered kicking again and again, not just to score higher at your commanders record, but also to repeat this image of how your stupid steel boots so easily destroy the head of an intelligent young man or girl ? And later, when you throwed those who were wounded and could not escape anymore onto pick-ups and trucks to bring them to Evin Prison or Ghezel Hesar, I’m sure you knew that this was not a journey for medical treatment or recovery, but to further harras and rape and kill them. And if you later saw the pictures of Neda Agha-Soltan and Sohrab Arabi, cowardly killed by you and your commrades, how long did those pictures appeared in your dreams, before you got rid of them with more drugs and blood-money and more violence ?
But you should know, Basidj, that what you did 2009 on Tohid square wont be forgotten. You turned a peaceful demonstration into a blood shed. The hundred thousands that walked the streets those days, wearing green T-shirts and green shawls did not had enough phantasy to think that this day might end up in violence. The girls had put on their most beautiful jewelery and make-up and the men kept their expensive lap-tops with them in their bags. People were sure that this day would demonstrate the power of a peaceful political change and give hope for a better future of this country . The people on the streets felt the dawn of  a grey period of political speechlessness, and they were hoping to meet some of the political leaders to discuss the future of the country after the elections.
The millions who gave their vote in the 2009 election and later formed an endless band of the green movement in the streets of Tehran, they wont forget that their hope for a peaceful move was turned into a violent nightmare by Basidj cowards just like you. And the next time when they meet you on the same streets, don”t expect any more unarmed young intellectuals. The next time, Basidj, you will be attacked, there wont be an option for peaceful settlement any more. And when the magazin of your automatic gun is empty, and you again killed and wounded the first twenty of the protesters, than there will come another twenty and another twenty and the same to each other of your Basidj commrades. There will be hundred thousands again coming out of the universities, of the restaurants and shops and beauty-salons, from all the places they escaped to in 2009, when they had to run away from your guns and butons. But this time they wont run away any more, and they dont want to talk to you any more, but they will attack you and kill you. And then, the streets of Tehran will turn red again, but this time it will be your damned blood.
And if somebody will throw your dead corpse into the gateway of your house, there wont be anybody crying tears for your death. Your mother will come out at night and bring you corpse to the waste bin of the garden, together with the chicken-heads and rotten carrots and the bad smelling polo from last week. Your parents will be ashamed of you, there will be no mourning for you. And for all the cowardize of your life, Basidj, your children will forget your name. To avoid that others would point with fingers on them, they will tell everybody that they don’t know who their father was. Your name will be forgotten in a new, free Iran. And only the history text books will know a precise number of nameless Basidj cowards. And you will have been one of them, not more, but also not less.

2.6.11

Irans New Halal Internet

Irans head of economic affairs, Mr. Ali Aghamohammadi, surprised the whole IT community today by announcing the recent ground-breaking development from the Basiji telecommunication workshop:
The new Internet 3.0 with implemented Halal Option.



At the end of an IRNA press-conference in Teheran he entered the stage in his usual black business suit and started his speech with the words:

“One more thing: Iran will soon create an internet that conforms to Islamic principles and to improve its communication and trade links with the world.”

This next-generation Internet (termed Net 3.0) will include the following advanced features:


1.) Computers will work only if their screen is turned eastward, therefore facing Mekka.

2.) The internet data transmission will be interrupted 5 times a day precisely as determined by the Ajatollah Chamenei to allow everybody to attend the prayer.

3.) Computer mouse will be replaced by a computer lamb, since the first is not mentioned in the Quran as a halal creature.

4.) Before switching on, computer plugs have to be washed thoroughly under running water.

5.) The bus-size will be 11 bit. A 12th bit will be added upon the arrival of the Mahdi.

6.) Each computer will come with a chemical spray to clean it off StuxNet-Virus.

To read how the community of iranian bloggers welcomes this new announcement, klick here.