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Irans New Halal Internet

Irans head of economic affairs, Mr. Ali Aghamohammadi, surprised the whole IT community today by announcing the recent ground-breaking development from the Basiji telecommunication workshop:
The new Internet 3.0 with implemented Halal Option.

At the end of an IRNA press-conference in Teheran he entered the stage in his usual black business suit and started his speech with the words:

“One more thing: Iran will soon create an internet that conforms to Islamic principles and to improve its communication and trade links with the world.”

This next-generation Internet (termed Net 3.0) will include the following advanced features:

1.) Computers will work only if their screen is turned eastward, therefore facing Mekka.

2.) The internet data transmission will be interrupted 5 times a day precisely as determined by the Ajatollah Chamenei to allow everybody to attend the prayer.

3.) Computer mouse will be replaced by a computer lamb, since the first is not mentioned in the Quran as a halal creature.

4.) Before switching on, computer plugs have to be washed thoroughly under running water.

5.) The bus-size will be 11 bit. A 12th bit will be added upon the arrival of the Mahdi.

6.) Each computer will come with a chemical spray to clean it off StuxNet-Virus.

To read how the community of iranian bloggers welcomes this new announcement, klick here.

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