Ghazal my Dear,
Usually I hate the S-Bahn for never beeing on-time. Today I hated it for beeing on-time for the first time. Why couldn"t it come an hour late ? Or better not coming at all. I feel very bad leaving you alone, it was such a nice evening. I never thought that it is possible to talk to somebody so easy and openly. You are not an ordinary girl, Ghazal. You are full of mysteries, which are mysterious perhaps even for yourself. If you feel you are not like everybody else, don"t worry. You will overcome all odds. Don"t fear anybody, you are strong enough.
Sleep well, send some words, if you are still awake.
Michael
...............................................................................................
hi michael,
yes it was on time, but had to wait a long time anyway, 17 minutes or something. dont feel bad for leaving me alone! im grown up and can take care of myself:) but thank you for always being so caring and nice to me.
i always think im ordinary. everyone is special in its own way.
sleep well, and have fun with your sister and her children. hope your son got good grades.
auf wiedershen (know its the wrong spelling)
/ghazal
30.7.10
Invitation to an Interview
Dear Ghazal,
I will arrive a bit later today, since I have to do these PhD interviews.
In case you changed your mind and would like to apply in the last moment, I"ll be available through Skype till 10.30 (Skype contact "michaelr...."). But be aware: I am an awful and very mean examiner !!!! ;-}
Michael
................................................................................................
Hi michael,
good luck with the interviews!
so you mean that this is my last chance to apply. haha dont think we need an interview. think you know me that much already.
see you!
...............................................................................................
Hi Ghazal
Am 30.07.2010 10:22, schrieb F....., Ghazal:
> Hi michael,
> so you mean that this is my last chance to apply.
There is never a last chance. That"s at least my firm believe. Although, one should always try to take a chance every day,
sometimes you also have to be patient and never give up.
"Take the bull by the horns" or as the old romans use to say "Carpe diem".
> haha dont think we need an interview.
Thats right. I think we have a never ending interview already runing since March this year.
> think you know me that much already.
>
I know you a bit. But I also think that I discover something new on you almost every day. For instance your preference for Sauerkraut, which came to me as a complete surprise.
> see you!
>
Auf Wiedersehen, Mrs. F.......
I will arrive a bit later today, since I have to do these PhD interviews.
In case you changed your mind and would like to apply in the last moment, I"ll be available through Skype till 10.30 (Skype contact "michaelr...."). But be aware: I am an awful and very mean examiner !!!! ;-}
Michael
................................................................................................
Hi michael,
good luck with the interviews!
so you mean that this is my last chance to apply. haha dont think we need an interview. think you know me that much already.
see you!
...............................................................................................
Hi Ghazal
Am 30.07.2010 10:22, schrieb F....., Ghazal:
> Hi michael,
> so you mean that this is my last chance to apply.
There is never a last chance. That"s at least my firm believe. Although, one should always try to take a chance every day,
sometimes you also have to be patient and never give up.
"Take the bull by the horns" or as the old romans use to say "Carpe diem".
> haha dont think we need an interview.
Thats right. I think we have a never ending interview already runing since March this year.
> think you know me that much already.
>
I know you a bit. But I also think that I discover something new on you almost every day. For instance your preference for Sauerkraut, which came to me as a complete surprise.
> see you!
>
Auf Wiedersehen, Mrs. F.......
Sun-Light and Skin Tanning
Ghazal my dear,
Hope you arrived well in Unterschleissheim. Just for your interest, and maybe to be used for your PhD project in Stockholm on UV-radiobiology, I found a nice review article explaining how UV-exposure upregulates pigmentation through tanning.
What seems to be essential are the UV induced Thymin-Dimers on the DNA of keratinocytes. Through P53 (as usual), pro-opiomelanocortin (POMC) is expressed and quickly converted into a-Msh (Melanocyte stimulating hormone). This is released from keratinocytes and binds to a Melanocortin1-Receptor (Mc1r) on melanocytes. They, in turn increase the production of Eumelanin (the brown-blackish pigment characteristic for tan). The only thing I still don"t understand is why a P53 response after ionising radiation causes other cellular effects (like cell-cycle block or apoptosis) than after UV-damage ? Somewhere, there must be a specific pathway.
What is very interesting, it was shown that treating skin simply with thymidin-rich DNA induces tanning itself (without the detrimental side effects of a UV exposure). But to be honest, I don"t understand the desire of people to get tanned at all. It looks much more aristocratic beeing pale, don"t you think so.
Are you going to watch the Insomnia movie tonight ? I remember it is a rather slow movie, with long camera settings and nice pictures.
Absolute the oposite to yesterdays action film. I"m afraid you might fall asleep, since it is so slow and tranquil. Would be an absurd thing, if you fall asleep during a movie that is about sleepness.
You know what is funny: Your ex-watch (now it is mine, o.k.) runs on the second since you gave it to me. I just contemplate whether it would be possible to permanently link the two watches with each other by a "telepathic extrasensual connector" (sounds to technical to you, my dear ?).
Have a look at this artikel on a phenomenon called Quantum Entanglement. If this works (what I hope) we could stay connected even over long distances by wearing the same watch at the same time. I agree that sounds weared, sounds like a plot for a movie even more weared than the one from yesterday. I don"t want to cause you headache, my dear. Just sometimes my phantasy goes wild. To be honest, I just want to keep the watch as a memory.
Enjoy the evening
Take Care
Michael
................................................................................................
hi michael!
thank you for the article. so interesting, so the thymidine dimers gives the tanning. so strange. yes, why does p53 react differently with ionisin radiation and uv-light. well they give different dna-damages. so that is probably how it recognize how to react. but why it reacts differently is a mystery. :) it looks nice to be tanned, on some people. i think i look best when im tanned. but i dont mind being pale. both is nice.
i dont think i will watch the insomnia movie. i just woke up. but i will save the movie for the week-end maybe. i bought two sauerkraut (think its called). i ate one whole package today! it is so nice. they still dont know which car i will get. but he said that 99% audi a3. i would be soooo happy if that is the car. so just have to hope until wednseday.
the thing with the watch seems very complicated! my watch works on the second right now. but maybe it needs time to slow down, we will see.
have a good evening.
/Ghazal
...............................................................................................
Ghazal my Dear,
Maybe you are right that P53 can sense differences between the various types of DNA damage (strand-breaks vs. Thymidine-Dimers). P53 has a whole range of different peptides, that can all be phophorylated or otherwise activated. In theory, this could than (in response to different types of DNA damage) also transactivate different target genes (for instance P21 after IR and POMC after UV). But to my knowledge, this is yet speculative. You see, still many exiting things to discover for you (I think I don"t have to repeat how much I"d like to convince you to stay here for a PhD).
About tanning: In addition to the accelerated skin aging, I prefer pale skin from an aesthetic point of view. In your case, it most attractively contrasts with your dark hair. Stay as you are, Ghazal. There is nothing in you to improve, honestly.
When I brought you home yesterday night you asked about the different phrases used in Germany to say good-bye. I hope, this was just a general linguistic interest, rather than the feeling that you have to prepare for a farewell from here. Please, no unneccessary thoughts.
Just for your "scientific interest": the most offical "Auf Wiedersehen" is very nice in this sense, since it implies not a long, but only a temporal absence. You translated it quite right yesterday with "See you again soon".
"Tschau" comes from the italian "Ciao", short for "Arrivederci". I guess that the german "Tschuess" is derived from "Ciao", but is mainly used in the north and it is rather neutral and un-personal. You can say "Tschuess" if you leave a Shop. What is a special south-german / austrian phrase is "Servus", which comes from "to serve" and means "I will serve you". It is used both as a greeting as well as for farewell. Sometimes used in literature with a slightly melancholic connotation (for a sad farewell).
The english / swedish "Farewell" means something for ever, I think. It originally means "Happy Journey" or so, from the old-german "Fahre wohl". I hope we"ll never have to use such a terminal phrase, my dear.
Sleep well, dream well, smile, if you want (good luck with the Audi A3)
Take Care,
Michael
Hope you arrived well in Unterschleissheim. Just for your interest, and maybe to be used for your PhD project in Stockholm on UV-radiobiology, I found a nice review article explaining how UV-exposure upregulates pigmentation through tanning.
What seems to be essential are the UV induced Thymin-Dimers on the DNA of keratinocytes. Through P53 (as usual), pro-opiomelanocortin (POMC) is expressed and quickly converted into a-Msh (Melanocyte stimulating hormone). This is released from keratinocytes and binds to a Melanocortin1-Receptor (Mc1r) on melanocytes. They, in turn increase the production of Eumelanin (the brown-blackish pigment characteristic for tan). The only thing I still don"t understand is why a P53 response after ionising radiation causes other cellular effects (like cell-cycle block or apoptosis) than after UV-damage ? Somewhere, there must be a specific pathway.
What is very interesting, it was shown that treating skin simply with thymidin-rich DNA induces tanning itself (without the detrimental side effects of a UV exposure). But to be honest, I don"t understand the desire of people to get tanned at all. It looks much more aristocratic beeing pale, don"t you think so.
Are you going to watch the Insomnia movie tonight ? I remember it is a rather slow movie, with long camera settings and nice pictures.
Absolute the oposite to yesterdays action film. I"m afraid you might fall asleep, since it is so slow and tranquil. Would be an absurd thing, if you fall asleep during a movie that is about sleepness.
You know what is funny: Your ex-watch (now it is mine, o.k.) runs on the second since you gave it to me. I just contemplate whether it would be possible to permanently link the two watches with each other by a "telepathic extrasensual connector" (sounds to technical to you, my dear ?).
Have a look at this artikel on a phenomenon called Quantum Entanglement. If this works (what I hope) we could stay connected even over long distances by wearing the same watch at the same time. I agree that sounds weared, sounds like a plot for a movie even more weared than the one from yesterday. I don"t want to cause you headache, my dear. Just sometimes my phantasy goes wild. To be honest, I just want to keep the watch as a memory.
Enjoy the evening
Take Care
Michael
................................................................................................
hi michael!
thank you for the article. so interesting, so the thymidine dimers gives the tanning. so strange. yes, why does p53 react differently with ionisin radiation and uv-light. well they give different dna-damages. so that is probably how it recognize how to react. but why it reacts differently is a mystery. :) it looks nice to be tanned, on some people. i think i look best when im tanned. but i dont mind being pale. both is nice.
i dont think i will watch the insomnia movie. i just woke up. but i will save the movie for the week-end maybe. i bought two sauerkraut (think its called). i ate one whole package today! it is so nice. they still dont know which car i will get. but he said that 99% audi a3. i would be soooo happy if that is the car. so just have to hope until wednseday.
the thing with the watch seems very complicated! my watch works on the second right now. but maybe it needs time to slow down, we will see.
have a good evening.
/Ghazal
...............................................................................................
Ghazal my Dear,
Maybe you are right that P53 can sense differences between the various types of DNA damage (strand-breaks vs. Thymidine-Dimers). P53 has a whole range of different peptides, that can all be phophorylated or otherwise activated. In theory, this could than (in response to different types of DNA damage) also transactivate different target genes (for instance P21 after IR and POMC after UV). But to my knowledge, this is yet speculative. You see, still many exiting things to discover for you (I think I don"t have to repeat how much I"d like to convince you to stay here for a PhD).
About tanning: In addition to the accelerated skin aging, I prefer pale skin from an aesthetic point of view. In your case, it most attractively contrasts with your dark hair. Stay as you are, Ghazal. There is nothing in you to improve, honestly.
When I brought you home yesterday night you asked about the different phrases used in Germany to say good-bye. I hope, this was just a general linguistic interest, rather than the feeling that you have to prepare for a farewell from here. Please, no unneccessary thoughts.
Just for your "scientific interest": the most offical "Auf Wiedersehen" is very nice in this sense, since it implies not a long, but only a temporal absence. You translated it quite right yesterday with "See you again soon".
"Tschau" comes from the italian "Ciao", short for "Arrivederci". I guess that the german "Tschuess" is derived from "Ciao", but is mainly used in the north and it is rather neutral and un-personal. You can say "Tschuess" if you leave a Shop. What is a special south-german / austrian phrase is "Servus", which comes from "to serve" and means "I will serve you". It is used both as a greeting as well as for farewell. Sometimes used in literature with a slightly melancholic connotation (for a sad farewell).
The english / swedish "Farewell" means something for ever, I think. It originally means "Happy Journey" or so, from the old-german "Fahre wohl". I hope we"ll never have to use such a terminal phrase, my dear.
Sleep well, dream well, smile, if you want (good luck with the Audi A3)
Take Care,
Michael
29.7.10
Coming home from the Movies ("Inception")
Ghazal, my Dear,
Did you arrived well in your apartment ? I was waiting untill I saw the light going on behind your window, so I could be sure that the stairway up to your apartment did not twist in an endless loop as in the movie "Inception". Ghazal, my dear, I was so happy to hear that it was not my personal ignorance that gave me problems to fully understanding the sense of the movie, but that you had some doubts as well. To be honest, our talks and ideas about dreams and how they influence our ordinary life seemed to me much more original and exciting than the movie.
However, I want to say thanks for the nice time you tolerated me on your side and for smuggling me into the cinema as a student-mate, and thanks for the sunshine before the movie and for showing me the moon-light later on.
Take Care
Michael
Did you arrived well in your apartment ? I was waiting untill I saw the light going on behind your window, so I could be sure that the stairway up to your apartment did not twist in an endless loop as in the movie "Inception". Ghazal, my dear, I was so happy to hear that it was not my personal ignorance that gave me problems to fully understanding the sense of the movie, but that you had some doubts as well. To be honest, our talks and ideas about dreams and how they influence our ordinary life seemed to me much more original and exciting than the movie.
However, I want to say thanks for the nice time you tolerated me on your side and for smuggling me into the cinema as a student-mate, and thanks for the sunshine before the movie and for showing me the moon-light later on.
Take Care
Michael
28.7.10
Schizophrenia ? Kind of !
Hi Ghazal my Dear,
What are you doing on such a wet day ? Same procedure as last evening I guess. Why are you so quiet again ? It was a pitty you left so quickly today. I got the feeling you wanted to rescue the last piece of bread from my hungry mouth, didn"t you ?
The rest of the week will stay wet and unpleasant, unfortunately not a good time to go out for a walk. But we could go to the movies ones again, or to an exhibition or concert. I hope you are not tired by my invitations. I still hope that you propose something.
Please write some words before going to bed.
Take Care my Dear
Michael
PS: Whether you believe it or not, it is the same person that writes you the e-mails and that is around in the institute during the day. And I"m not schizophrenic, just try to keep two spheres of life separate. I know it is impossible,but at least I can try to give the impression to the outside..
...............................................................................................
hi michael,
did you return your thing ?
i love the bread. i still have it for tomorrow. no you could have the bread, did not know that you wanted more.
i was looking on uv light and melanin production.. i still think its the melanin production that is increased. i mean, normally they produce less, then when it is exposed to uv it increases. but i could be wrong. i asked dag jenssen, hope he answers.
u can have a look at this abstract, i couldnt get the whole article.
we could maybe do something on friday, or thursday.
have a good night!
................................................................................................
Ghazal my Dear,
It is o.k. with the bread, I liked it but could not eat much more (like with chocolate).
Thanks a lot for the literature search you did about the problem of UV-induced gene regulation. You are so careful, I did not expect that someone else would sit on the computer right away and try to collect some informations. Thanks once again. I"ll read the articles tomorrow, because my WiFi at home is a bit slow today.
Do you have an idea already what you"d like to do Thursday or Friday. Whatever you dream of, I"ll be happy to guide you. A weared music pub,an avantgard jazz-club, a posh disco, a fine movie, restaurant (if you want I"ll stay for the whole evening with you at McDonalds). I"ll be happy to go with you anywhere. Just outdoor activities will be difficult, due to the rainy weather.
Sleep well,my Dear
Michael
PS: In principal, I personal don"t need the split between scientific day-work and privat evening relation. I love both, I really love my work, Ghazal, and I think science can also give big spiritual satisfaction, same as the time and the conversation with you after work. I don"t see a contradiction between the two. Maybe for you it is different, I try to respect this and try to make it feasible for you. Don"t want you to hate me at the end..
................................................................................................
Ghazal ,my Dear, you are indeed an Angel doing night-shift work !!!
If I understand right what you put together about UV-exposure and tanning, then it is indeed an upregulated melanin-production rather than a proliferation of the melanocytes. But then, as discussed today on our drive to the Uni, there must be a melanin-promoter that respondes to UV light and switches on the melanin-gene. I just cannot imagine this has not been identified and cloned so far.
We will check tomorrow.
Have a good night
Michael
What are you doing on such a wet day ? Same procedure as last evening I guess. Why are you so quiet again ? It was a pitty you left so quickly today. I got the feeling you wanted to rescue the last piece of bread from my hungry mouth, didn"t you ?
The rest of the week will stay wet and unpleasant, unfortunately not a good time to go out for a walk. But we could go to the movies ones again, or to an exhibition or concert. I hope you are not tired by my invitations. I still hope that you propose something.
Please write some words before going to bed.
Take Care my Dear
Michael
PS: Whether you believe it or not, it is the same person that writes you the e-mails and that is around in the institute during the day. And I"m not schizophrenic, just try to keep two spheres of life separate. I know it is impossible,but at least I can try to give the impression to the outside..
...............................................................................................
hi michael,
did you return your thing ?
i love the bread. i still have it for tomorrow. no you could have the bread, did not know that you wanted more.
i was looking on uv light and melanin production.. i still think its the melanin production that is increased. i mean, normally they produce less, then when it is exposed to uv it increases. but i could be wrong. i asked dag jenssen, hope he answers.
u can have a look at this abstract, i couldnt get the whole article.
we could maybe do something on friday, or thursday.
have a good night!
................................................................................................
Ghazal my Dear,
It is o.k. with the bread, I liked it but could not eat much more (like with chocolate).
Thanks a lot for the literature search you did about the problem of UV-induced gene regulation. You are so careful, I did not expect that someone else would sit on the computer right away and try to collect some informations. Thanks once again. I"ll read the articles tomorrow, because my WiFi at home is a bit slow today.
Do you have an idea already what you"d like to do Thursday or Friday. Whatever you dream of, I"ll be happy to guide you. A weared music pub,an avantgard jazz-club, a posh disco, a fine movie, restaurant (if you want I"ll stay for the whole evening with you at McDonalds). I"ll be happy to go with you anywhere. Just outdoor activities will be difficult, due to the rainy weather.
Sleep well,my Dear
Michael
PS: In principal, I personal don"t need the split between scientific day-work and privat evening relation. I love both, I really love my work, Ghazal, and I think science can also give big spiritual satisfaction, same as the time and the conversation with you after work. I don"t see a contradiction between the two. Maybe for you it is different, I try to respect this and try to make it feasible for you. Don"t want you to hate me at the end..
................................................................................................
Ghazal ,my Dear, you are indeed an Angel doing night-shift work !!!
If I understand right what you put together about UV-exposure and tanning, then it is indeed an upregulated melanin-production rather than a proliferation of the melanocytes. But then, as discussed today on our drive to the Uni, there must be a melanin-promoter that respondes to UV light and switches on the melanin-gene. I just cannot imagine this has not been identified and cloned so far.
We will check tomorrow.
Have a good night
Michael
27.7.10
Stjaernfall and Full Moon
Ghazal, my Dear,
It is fair enough to be as sceptical as you have been today at the bus-stop, when I announced you the heavy meteor-shower (or stjärnfall in swedish) that will happen in August.
I mean you have to be sceptical if somebody tries to tell you funny story, because you are a scientist and therefore should only trust your own observations.
But now you also have to give me the chance to show you real evidence of the meteors, which will definitly be plenty falling on August 12th. As a first foretaste, have a look at this article in wikipedia
But Ghazal, no chance to tell me you are already convinced now by the article. You"ve had your chance to trust me, you have not used it, you decided to laugh on me. Now you have to give me the chance to show you the meteors in real life. August 12th (the day with the projected highest meteor frquency) will be a Thursday in two weeks time. Sunset will be at 8.35 p.m., therefore at 9 o"clock we should nicely see the first "stjärn fallen". By the way, according to popular mythology you can express a wish if you see one. You should, however, not tell anybody else about it. I don"t know what happens, if two people have two contradictory wishes at one and the same meteor ? Maybe the meteor than tries to find an arrangement that could satisfy both or maybe the meteor breaks apart and continues as two separate fragments (what indeed can be observed occasionally).
I wish you a good night, hope you can sleep in spite of the full moon.
Take Care, my Dear
Michael
PS:
You asked in your yesterdays e-mail "....fallen in love? hope that this change in you are a good change for your life."
My firm believ is that love is always good. It is somethink special and precious, and it means to see somebody as an other human beeing absolutely unique and not replaceable by anybody else. The other person whom you love becomes more and more a part of yourself, you are always trying to see and judge life and the world through the imaginary eyes of the other person. You think that without the other person you are only half a man. In this sense, it is much much more than to feel sympathy for somebody or to say "I like somebody". I mean you can like many people, you can like a whole nation if you want. But you impossibly can love a whole nation. Therefore, when american singers shout from the stage "I love you" to the entire audience, I find it weared.
If you ask me, what the hell I"m thinking I am to fall in love to you, Ghazal, I have to say that I had no choice. But I also did not actively tried to fight against it.
I know I have no chance other than trying to sublimate in words or a Blog or a book what I feel.
................................................................................................
Ghazal, my Dear,
I hope the postscriptum of my e-mail has not upset or even offended you. I"m very rarely speak to somebody as openly as to you, because I think you understand and you don"t bear this load of social stereotypes, psychological prejudices and political correctnesses.
Your judgements are sometimes absolutely unexpected to me, really funny, but they come from an honest heart, they are not intended to present you in a particular light.
Please don"t forget to send me some nice thoughts before you go to bed. There is still full moon tonight, but as much as I can see, the cloudes are even heavier than yesterday. I will continue to watch out, usually the moon rises highest around 1 at night. If it will be nicely visible then, I"ll come around and wake you up.
Is this o.k. ? (Don"t worry, Ghazal, I won"t come unless invited).
Take Care my Dear
Michael
................................................................................................
hi michael,
i was sleeping sorry. i will continue to sleep now. :-) so i will miss the full moon. but its fine. i still have your picture from yesterday.
i will read about stjärnfall, seems interesting.
have agood night! sleep good.
Ghazal
..........................................................
Sleep well my dear ! Next chance to see the full moon in exactly one month time.
It is fair enough to be as sceptical as you have been today at the bus-stop, when I announced you the heavy meteor-shower (or stjärnfall in swedish) that will happen in August.
I mean you have to be sceptical if somebody tries to tell you funny story, because you are a scientist and therefore should only trust your own observations.
But now you also have to give me the chance to show you real evidence of the meteors, which will definitly be plenty falling on August 12th. As a first foretaste, have a look at this article in wikipedia
But Ghazal, no chance to tell me you are already convinced now by the article. You"ve had your chance to trust me, you have not used it, you decided to laugh on me. Now you have to give me the chance to show you the meteors in real life. August 12th (the day with the projected highest meteor frquency) will be a Thursday in two weeks time. Sunset will be at 8.35 p.m., therefore at 9 o"clock we should nicely see the first "stjärn fallen". By the way, according to popular mythology you can express a wish if you see one. You should, however, not tell anybody else about it. I don"t know what happens, if two people have two contradictory wishes at one and the same meteor ? Maybe the meteor than tries to find an arrangement that could satisfy both or maybe the meteor breaks apart and continues as two separate fragments (what indeed can be observed occasionally).
I wish you a good night, hope you can sleep in spite of the full moon.
Take Care, my Dear
Michael
PS:
You asked in your yesterdays e-mail "....fallen in love? hope that this change in you are a good change for your life."
My firm believ is that love is always good. It is somethink special and precious, and it means to see somebody as an other human beeing absolutely unique and not replaceable by anybody else. The other person whom you love becomes more and more a part of yourself, you are always trying to see and judge life and the world through the imaginary eyes of the other person. You think that without the other person you are only half a man. In this sense, it is much much more than to feel sympathy for somebody or to say "I like somebody". I mean you can like many people, you can like a whole nation if you want. But you impossibly can love a whole nation. Therefore, when american singers shout from the stage "I love you" to the entire audience, I find it weared.
If you ask me, what the hell I"m thinking I am to fall in love to you, Ghazal, I have to say that I had no choice. But I also did not actively tried to fight against it.
I know I have no chance other than trying to sublimate in words or a Blog or a book what I feel.
................................................................................................
Ghazal, my Dear,
I hope the postscriptum of my e-mail has not upset or even offended you. I"m very rarely speak to somebody as openly as to you, because I think you understand and you don"t bear this load of social stereotypes, psychological prejudices and political correctnesses.
Your judgements are sometimes absolutely unexpected to me, really funny, but they come from an honest heart, they are not intended to present you in a particular light.
Please don"t forget to send me some nice thoughts before you go to bed. There is still full moon tonight, but as much as I can see, the cloudes are even heavier than yesterday. I will continue to watch out, usually the moon rises highest around 1 at night. If it will be nicely visible then, I"ll come around and wake you up.
Is this o.k. ? (Don"t worry, Ghazal, I won"t come unless invited).
Take Care my Dear
Michael
................................................................................................
hi michael,
i was sleeping sorry. i will continue to sleep now. :-) so i will miss the full moon. but its fine. i still have your picture from yesterday.
i will read about stjärnfall, seems interesting.
have agood night! sleep good.
Ghazal
..........................................................
Sleep well my dear ! Next chance to see the full moon in exactly one month time.
25.7.10
Sandman and Sauerkraut
Hi Ghazal my Dear,
It was a pitty I found your e-mail (the one you wrote 2 o"clock a.m. last night) only this morning.
Hopefully, you did not stoud awake for the rest of the night waiting for an answer. If I would have known that you didn"t sleep yet, I would have checked my mail-box at night again.
Sometimes it is fascinating to stay awake, while the rest of the world sleeps, don"t you think so ? One gets the feeling to be alone in the universe with its own thoughts, which can evolve more freely then. I think the night is a very productive time if one has to bring back to mind what happened during the day. O.k., one might lack some of the important REM-Phases in such a night, but this might be compensated by some extra nocturnal experiences. By the way, we have here in Germany the mythological figure of the Sandmann, a very friendly little gnome who visits all kids in the evening and blows them some sand into the face (to make them sleepy). Do you have such a character in Sweden too ? Here we even have a daily short TV-program featuring Sandman for the kids. This is supposed to be the signal for them to go to bed.
What you wrote about the relationship to your mom was very intriguing, and it is perhaps a rare case that between the generations such an intense and confidental link exists. But perhaps you are also very important for your mom,like the outpost in the modern world. For sure, she needs you as much as you need her. I would be extremely courious to see how you explain your mom your newly discovered love for our Sauerkraut. I mean the stuff is really delicious, therefore I absolutely understand you eat almost the whole pack at once. But still, the stuff is considered so typical german, that a commonen nickname for Germans in english is KRAUT.
But meanwhile, Sauerkraut also became very popular on the Balkan states (ask Natascha), in Russia and even in Korea (where they add some very spicy ingredients). And now, for the first time in history, we might see Sauerkraut even become a delicatesse in Sweden and Persia (with your help as a gourmet ambassador).
Ghazal, my dear, in case you want to hear some nice radio music tonight: a few minutes ago a 5 hours program about the Beatles started on Bavarian Radio 2 . You might find the station on your radio at 88.4 MHz or 89.5 MHz.
I hope you had a nice day and you had your own sunshine inside of you. I wish you a relaxing and inspiring evening and a night with nice dreams.
Take Care
Michael
................................................................................................
hi michael,
i slept directly after the email, its fine=)
i never thought about that, that u could be the awake while the world sleeps. i just have that feeling when i drive at night. i feel so free and that the road is mine haha.
no, i have never heard about the sandman before. how can sand make u sleep i wonder.
i ate all the sauerkraut today. really tasty. i told my mum about it and she think she knows what it is, i will show her when she comes.
i wish u a good night as well!!
/ghazal
................................................................................................
Ghazal, my dear,
you are perhaps an angel flying around at night in your dreams. Where do you drive at night in your car ? Could be dangerous, dont you think so ? But maybe you are looking just for this danger at night ?
Do you remember when I suggested your preference for the taste of Bitter Lemon might have something to do with a general feeling of convidence and overwhelming happiness, so you are intentionally seeking for some risk that gives you a thrill. It is the same why people go to the Tivoli fun fair, they usually only go if they are happy. And the thrill of danger at the giant wheel or the train-of-horrors shall add some flavour to an otherwise to monotonous happiness.
Ghazal, I miss you a bit.
Michael
It was a pitty I found your e-mail (the one you wrote 2 o"clock a.m. last night) only this morning.
Hopefully, you did not stoud awake for the rest of the night waiting for an answer. If I would have known that you didn"t sleep yet, I would have checked my mail-box at night again.
Sometimes it is fascinating to stay awake, while the rest of the world sleeps, don"t you think so ? One gets the feeling to be alone in the universe with its own thoughts, which can evolve more freely then. I think the night is a very productive time if one has to bring back to mind what happened during the day. O.k., one might lack some of the important REM-Phases in such a night, but this might be compensated by some extra nocturnal experiences. By the way, we have here in Germany the mythological figure of the Sandmann, a very friendly little gnome who visits all kids in the evening and blows them some sand into the face (to make them sleepy). Do you have such a character in Sweden too ? Here we even have a daily short TV-program featuring Sandman for the kids. This is supposed to be the signal for them to go to bed.
What you wrote about the relationship to your mom was very intriguing, and it is perhaps a rare case that between the generations such an intense and confidental link exists. But perhaps you are also very important for your mom,like the outpost in the modern world. For sure, she needs you as much as you need her. I would be extremely courious to see how you explain your mom your newly discovered love for our Sauerkraut. I mean the stuff is really delicious, therefore I absolutely understand you eat almost the whole pack at once. But still, the stuff is considered so typical german, that a commonen nickname for Germans in english is KRAUT.
But meanwhile, Sauerkraut also became very popular on the Balkan states (ask Natascha), in Russia and even in Korea (where they add some very spicy ingredients). And now, for the first time in history, we might see Sauerkraut even become a delicatesse in Sweden and Persia (with your help as a gourmet ambassador).
Ghazal, my dear, in case you want to hear some nice radio music tonight: a few minutes ago a 5 hours program about the Beatles started on Bavarian Radio 2 . You might find the station on your radio at 88.4 MHz or 89.5 MHz.
I hope you had a nice day and you had your own sunshine inside of you. I wish you a relaxing and inspiring evening and a night with nice dreams.
Take Care
Michael
................................................................................................
hi michael,
i slept directly after the email, its fine=)
i never thought about that, that u could be the awake while the world sleeps. i just have that feeling when i drive at night. i feel so free and that the road is mine haha.
no, i have never heard about the sandman before. how can sand make u sleep i wonder.
i ate all the sauerkraut today. really tasty. i told my mum about it and she think she knows what it is, i will show her when she comes.
i wish u a good night as well!!
/ghazal
................................................................................................
Ghazal, my dear,
you are perhaps an angel flying around at night in your dreams. Where do you drive at night in your car ? Could be dangerous, dont you think so ? But maybe you are looking just for this danger at night ?
Do you remember when I suggested your preference for the taste of Bitter Lemon might have something to do with a general feeling of convidence and overwhelming happiness, so you are intentionally seeking for some risk that gives you a thrill. It is the same why people go to the Tivoli fun fair, they usually only go if they are happy. And the thrill of danger at the giant wheel or the train-of-horrors shall add some flavour to an otherwise to monotonous happiness.
Ghazal, I miss you a bit.
Michael
23.7.10
Getting the Blues
Hi Ghazal, my Dear,
How is your evening ? What do you do against the Blues. Yesterday during the Paolo Nutini concert we spoke about the meaning of "getting the blues". Today it seemed to me that you are also not completely free from getting melancholic without any obvious reason. Maybe it only happens if I am around, or maybe it is because you haven"t seen your family for such a long time.
I would so much like to be a secret observer when you are alone at home and feel free and relaxed and do what you like to do, like cook something or do the laundry or watch a movie. I"d like to see how your face changes then. I assume you will have this expression of complete absence in your eyes that I remember when you were sitting in the first row during the lecture.
I am probably right assuming that your are very introvert, trying to solve all problems by taking them home with you. You rarely ask somebody for help, I mean not help when a PCR evaporates, but help if you are not sure any more where to go and what to choose from the thousands of possible options every day. I would like to help you, but the only think I am quite sure about is that it is good for you to show you some nice places and events. With a few exceptions, it always seemes we like that same moments and places, and these are days you will never regret.
With the more longterm decision I much more hesitate to suggest something. If I say "Take a challenging PhD project in a high-class institution somewhere in Europe", maybe you will not be happy at the end. Difficult to predict in advance. The only thing I know, Ghazal, is that you have all prerequisites to become a successful and therefore happy woman. You have an excellent profession, a specialisation that will have absolute priority in the future, because people will realize more and more how important physical and mental health is and that all luxury goods and all money means nothing if you are ill. Therefore, much more ressources and money will go into this research in the future, and many intelligent scientists will be needed. And you will be one of them, thats for sure.
Just don"t panic, don"t fall into despair if it does not always goes fast and straight. There will always be people to help you, at least I will always be there if you need help or advice.
I went to a DVD-rental today and rent the Al-Pacino "Insomnia". I now do a copy for you, my dear.
Enjoy the evening, sleep well, recover, have fun during the REM phases (but send me a few words before, please)
Michael
................................................................................................
hi michael,
melancholic is when you are sad right? im not sad..why do you think im melancholic..
not much to see haha, i just kind of sit/lay on the sofa, and put the computer in front of me. i was eating indian food and some of the "salad" i bought with you, it is nice. but couldnt eat all even if i wanted to, it was too much.anyways, i fell so tired during the movie so i slept and just woke up again.
actually, i ask my mum for help a lot. i tell her everything of what i do and what i think and ask her for advise and so on. we are very close, like friends. and i always trust her. i know that she would never want anything bad for me. im kind of dependent on her.
for the phd that you showed me, i did not feel that it was something for me. a lot of physics, with protons and so on i felt.
thank you for having so much believe in me. but i could be anyone, there is nothing special with me when it comes to science. i just try to do my job like anyone else would.
thank you for making a copy of the insomnia (even if i dont think its legal). did you find gladiator movie? if not,, maybe i can ask my brother to bring one from home so u can borrow. or maybe he can make a copy. (if he is in a "helping-sister-out" mode).
take care and good night.
/ghazal
................................................................................................
Ghazal,my Dear,
Maybe melancholia is not the right word, maybe it is rather an expression of absolute quiescence coming from deep inside of your soul. I don"t mean I"m worried, I"m just fascinated and try to understand.
And therefore,if you say "nothing special to see", it is because you cannot see the changes in your eyes I might see.
It must be wunderful to have such a close relation with mum or dad as you have. In my situation its very different, I always have to try and solve the probems of my parents, they always expect that I listen to their problems and advise them or help.
I guess you already adapted your freefall position meanwhile. Just one last thing I"d like to know: Do you wait in the evening to receive a message from me, or is the more a burden for you to read it ?
Take Care, my dear
Michael
...............................................................................................
hi michael
a very late answer.
yes it is nice to be close to your parents. but im not that close to my dad. i meet him and have fun with him. but i dont share my thinkings and everything with him. but its fine. but it is good as well to not be close to your parents and to be independent.
yes its nice to recieve emails from you. its not a burden.
hope that u have a nice starfish position tonight.
good night!
How is your evening ? What do you do against the Blues. Yesterday during the Paolo Nutini concert we spoke about the meaning of "getting the blues". Today it seemed to me that you are also not completely free from getting melancholic without any obvious reason. Maybe it only happens if I am around, or maybe it is because you haven"t seen your family for such a long time.
I would so much like to be a secret observer when you are alone at home and feel free and relaxed and do what you like to do, like cook something or do the laundry or watch a movie. I"d like to see how your face changes then. I assume you will have this expression of complete absence in your eyes that I remember when you were sitting in the first row during the lecture.
I am probably right assuming that your are very introvert, trying to solve all problems by taking them home with you. You rarely ask somebody for help, I mean not help when a PCR evaporates, but help if you are not sure any more where to go and what to choose from the thousands of possible options every day. I would like to help you, but the only think I am quite sure about is that it is good for you to show you some nice places and events. With a few exceptions, it always seemes we like that same moments and places, and these are days you will never regret.
With the more longterm decision I much more hesitate to suggest something. If I say "Take a challenging PhD project in a high-class institution somewhere in Europe", maybe you will not be happy at the end. Difficult to predict in advance. The only thing I know, Ghazal, is that you have all prerequisites to become a successful and therefore happy woman. You have an excellent profession, a specialisation that will have absolute priority in the future, because people will realize more and more how important physical and mental health is and that all luxury goods and all money means nothing if you are ill. Therefore, much more ressources and money will go into this research in the future, and many intelligent scientists will be needed. And you will be one of them, thats for sure.
Just don"t panic, don"t fall into despair if it does not always goes fast and straight. There will always be people to help you, at least I will always be there if you need help or advice.
I went to a DVD-rental today and rent the Al-Pacino "Insomnia". I now do a copy for you, my dear.
Enjoy the evening, sleep well, recover, have fun during the REM phases (but send me a few words before, please)
Michael
................................................................................................
hi michael,
melancholic is when you are sad right? im not sad..why do you think im melancholic..
not much to see haha, i just kind of sit/lay on the sofa, and put the computer in front of me. i was eating indian food and some of the "salad" i bought with you, it is nice. but couldnt eat all even if i wanted to, it was too much.anyways, i fell so tired during the movie so i slept and just woke up again.
actually, i ask my mum for help a lot. i tell her everything of what i do and what i think and ask her for advise and so on. we are very close, like friends. and i always trust her. i know that she would never want anything bad for me. im kind of dependent on her.
for the phd that you showed me, i did not feel that it was something for me. a lot of physics, with protons and so on i felt.
thank you for having so much believe in me. but i could be anyone, there is nothing special with me when it comes to science. i just try to do my job like anyone else would.
thank you for making a copy of the insomnia (even if i dont think its legal). did you find gladiator movie? if not,, maybe i can ask my brother to bring one from home so u can borrow. or maybe he can make a copy. (if he is in a "helping-sister-out" mode).
take care and good night.
/ghazal
................................................................................................
Ghazal,my Dear,
Maybe melancholia is not the right word, maybe it is rather an expression of absolute quiescence coming from deep inside of your soul. I don"t mean I"m worried, I"m just fascinated and try to understand.
And therefore,if you say "nothing special to see", it is because you cannot see the changes in your eyes I might see.
It must be wunderful to have such a close relation with mum or dad as you have. In my situation its very different, I always have to try and solve the probems of my parents, they always expect that I listen to their problems and advise them or help.
I guess you already adapted your freefall position meanwhile. Just one last thing I"d like to know: Do you wait in the evening to receive a message from me, or is the more a burden for you to read it ?
Take Care, my dear
Michael
...............................................................................................
hi michael
a very late answer.
yes it is nice to be close to your parents. but im not that close to my dad. i meet him and have fun with him. but i dont share my thinkings and everything with him. but its fine. but it is good as well to not be close to your parents and to be independent.
yes its nice to recieve emails from you. its not a burden.
hope that u have a nice starfish position tonight.
good night!
22.7.10
Don"t look back in anger
Hi Ghazal, my Dear,
I hope so much that all the stress you had during the last weeks vanished now, and that you can just recover and sleep. I could feel with you how it is to have in one week two talks to give on a new subject in a new environment. You were hard fighting, Ghazal, I have to admit. I imagine myself in this situation, I would have lost my voice already after the first minute.
I think it was somehow not fair, that the Post-Docs and Senior Scientist were all just sitting there laid back and wanted to become entertained by the students. Thats not right, I have to admit. They should have also some tasks to fullfill, just for the purpose of justice and for the students to have something to laugh as well. I think I tried my best, same as you did.
Btw, my wife just called and threatened that she will set our house on fire if I don"t appeare there tonight. So what shall I do ? I don"t want to, but I have to go home. I will pass along the lake I have shown you from up the Olympic-Tower to swim a bit.
I think of you, Ghazal. Write me some sentences (if you are not sleeping yet).
Take Care, my Dear
Michael
..................................................................................................................................
hi michael,
yes i feel so good now that it is over. im so happy. it was a bit stressfull. no you would manage things perfectly fine if you were in my situation.i think you talk was good! yes a bit unfair but its okay, they will maybe do it next time.
okay, that is good, that you are going back home tonight. maybe you can solve things at home. its important.
hope that you had a good time at the lake.
good night!!
.................................................................................................................................
Ghazal , my Dear,
Did you arrived well in U-Schleissheim ? What are you doing now ? Poor Ghazal, no Pecha-Kucha Talk any more fill your evening hours, no Seminar any more to worry about. So how do you fill your evening hours ? O.k. yesterday I could imagine and accept that you had a big sleep deficiency to compensate. Did you had good or bad dreams last night ? Poor Ghazal, I remember the days when I had an important exam to pass or a talk to give or the like. You got nervous many weeks before, you think you sacrifice all your free time and your life energy for this. And then ? Then its done, than its over, and the idiots give the award to Mary (o.k. it was an act of diligence, but it was virtually just a report about a single book she red). How can they compare it to what you did ? You prepared a talk about a new subject, a subject for which you had to learn new theories and read a lot.
Ghazal, you have been my favorite yesterday (independent off all other feelings I have for you). Olena, I would say was also very ambigious. She had her own very original idea. She had something new to say, something she developed herself.
So for me, the proper ranking would be :
place 1 -3 : Ghazal, Olena, Michael
long, long, long gap:
Sissi (I talk about my hobby)
Lucia (I talk about my country)
Avinash (I talk about my job)
Ilaria (I talk about my religion)
Dominik (I talk about my project)
Mary (I talk about the book I red)
Don"t you think I"m right ? Maybe I"m to strict, but I very often think that the world around myself is doing stupid decisions and rankings. I was very proud of you when I realized you had the courage not to talk a second time about iranian new years eve. Ghazal, we are scientist, we should show that we take a challenge. We are pioneers, we should leave that established road.
It"s too bad that I cannot convince you to stay in Munich, either to do an ambigious PhD project or to live with me, or both, but independent from each other.
I think in general it would be much easer to separate the function of a friend and a supervisor. Now I have to separate it by the clock (9 - 5: supervisor, 5pm - 12 pm friend). Its is not that easy.
If you think I cause trouble to your live, please tell me. You know I always try to be open. I understand it is perhaps easy for me. You said last week at my post-midnight visit to you that you only see me, cause you cannot risk your project. This was very shocking for me, I have to admit, but it was o.k. that you have been so honest. I"m constantly trying to understand what you feel and what is your motivation and what you dream of.
Maybe you don"t believe me, but I really find it exciting to talk to you and to hear your points and your ideas which are sometimes funny and very often surprising. In particular I"m excited how easily you can challenge my established ideas. Thats the reason I talk too much, I always hope that you interrupt me and say "Stop here, what a freaky theory you are just trying to tell me!". Thats why I wrote this blog, it is not intended for the entire world to read, but in the first instance for you. If you insist, I can protect it with a password for you.
As every night I think of you and wish you a relaxing end-of-the-day and an angel who takes care of you.
Michael
..................................................................................................................................
hi michael,
yes i arrived well. i am fiiiinee michael. im so happy that the pecha kucha is over and i do everything that i did not have time with before. went to the supermarket, i did my laundry for example. i talk to my mum more. i just have fun. dont worry. i have been looking at hotels and so on. there is a lot to do.
everyone did a good job michael, i did not talk about midsummer las time. i talked about persian new years. but u are right, swedish midsummer would have been much easier to do than what i did, sleep. well i learnt alot about sleep. thats the point. i wasnt looking for a price seriously.
im sorry you are having a hard time separating supervisor and being friends. so it is a good thing that i will leave munich. u will have less problems. i am happy that i am going back home. to sweden. but i really enjoy munich at the moment. i like unterschleissheim.. all the places ive seen in munich have been nice.. the lab i like, the people are so nice.. so im having a good time. a nice summer. a lot thanks to you i think, u showed me munich and you help me in the lab.
michael, once again. i see you as my kind supervisor and a friend. i hope u see it this way too and nothing more. otherwise we cant be friends.
have a good night and nice dreams.
/ghazal
I hope so much that all the stress you had during the last weeks vanished now, and that you can just recover and sleep. I could feel with you how it is to have in one week two talks to give on a new subject in a new environment. You were hard fighting, Ghazal, I have to admit. I imagine myself in this situation, I would have lost my voice already after the first minute.
I think it was somehow not fair, that the Post-Docs and Senior Scientist were all just sitting there laid back and wanted to become entertained by the students. Thats not right, I have to admit. They should have also some tasks to fullfill, just for the purpose of justice and for the students to have something to laugh as well. I think I tried my best, same as you did.
Btw, my wife just called and threatened that she will set our house on fire if I don"t appeare there tonight. So what shall I do ? I don"t want to, but I have to go home. I will pass along the lake I have shown you from up the Olympic-Tower to swim a bit.
I think of you, Ghazal. Write me some sentences (if you are not sleeping yet).
Take Care, my Dear
Michael
..................................................................................................................................
hi michael,
yes i feel so good now that it is over. im so happy. it was a bit stressfull. no you would manage things perfectly fine if you were in my situation.i think you talk was good! yes a bit unfair but its okay, they will maybe do it next time.
okay, that is good, that you are going back home tonight. maybe you can solve things at home. its important.
hope that you had a good time at the lake.
good night!!
.................................................................................................................................
Ghazal , my Dear,
Did you arrived well in U-Schleissheim ? What are you doing now ? Poor Ghazal, no Pecha-Kucha Talk any more fill your evening hours, no Seminar any more to worry about. So how do you fill your evening hours ? O.k. yesterday I could imagine and accept that you had a big sleep deficiency to compensate. Did you had good or bad dreams last night ? Poor Ghazal, I remember the days when I had an important exam to pass or a talk to give or the like. You got nervous many weeks before, you think you sacrifice all your free time and your life energy for this. And then ? Then its done, than its over, and the idiots give the award to Mary (o.k. it was an act of diligence, but it was virtually just a report about a single book she red). How can they compare it to what you did ? You prepared a talk about a new subject, a subject for which you had to learn new theories and read a lot.
Ghazal, you have been my favorite yesterday (independent off all other feelings I have for you). Olena, I would say was also very ambigious. She had her own very original idea. She had something new to say, something she developed herself.
So for me, the proper ranking would be :
place 1 -3 : Ghazal, Olena, Michael
long, long, long gap:
Sissi (I talk about my hobby)
Lucia (I talk about my country)
Avinash (I talk about my job)
Ilaria (I talk about my religion)
Dominik (I talk about my project)
Mary (I talk about the book I red)
Don"t you think I"m right ? Maybe I"m to strict, but I very often think that the world around myself is doing stupid decisions and rankings. I was very proud of you when I realized you had the courage not to talk a second time about iranian new years eve. Ghazal, we are scientist, we should show that we take a challenge. We are pioneers, we should leave that established road.
It"s too bad that I cannot convince you to stay in Munich, either to do an ambigious PhD project or to live with me, or both, but independent from each other.
I think in general it would be much easer to separate the function of a friend and a supervisor. Now I have to separate it by the clock (9 - 5: supervisor, 5pm - 12 pm friend). Its is not that easy.
If you think I cause trouble to your live, please tell me. You know I always try to be open. I understand it is perhaps easy for me. You said last week at my post-midnight visit to you that you only see me, cause you cannot risk your project. This was very shocking for me, I have to admit, but it was o.k. that you have been so honest. I"m constantly trying to understand what you feel and what is your motivation and what you dream of.
Maybe you don"t believe me, but I really find it exciting to talk to you and to hear your points and your ideas which are sometimes funny and very often surprising. In particular I"m excited how easily you can challenge my established ideas. Thats the reason I talk too much, I always hope that you interrupt me and say "Stop here, what a freaky theory you are just trying to tell me!". Thats why I wrote this blog, it is not intended for the entire world to read, but in the first instance for you. If you insist, I can protect it with a password for you.
As every night I think of you and wish you a relaxing end-of-the-day and an angel who takes care of you.
Michael
..................................................................................................................................
hi michael,
yes i arrived well. i am fiiiinee michael. im so happy that the pecha kucha is over and i do everything that i did not have time with before. went to the supermarket, i did my laundry for example. i talk to my mum more. i just have fun. dont worry. i have been looking at hotels and so on. there is a lot to do.
everyone did a good job michael, i did not talk about midsummer las time. i talked about persian new years. but u are right, swedish midsummer would have been much easier to do than what i did, sleep. well i learnt alot about sleep. thats the point. i wasnt looking for a price seriously.
im sorry you are having a hard time separating supervisor and being friends. so it is a good thing that i will leave munich. u will have less problems. i am happy that i am going back home. to sweden. but i really enjoy munich at the moment. i like unterschleissheim.. all the places ive seen in munich have been nice.. the lab i like, the people are so nice.. so im having a good time. a nice summer. a lot thanks to you i think, u showed me munich and you help me in the lab.
michael, once again. i see you as my kind supervisor and a friend. i hope u see it this way too and nothing more. otherwise we cant be friends.
have a good night and nice dreams.
/ghazal
19.7.10
Epilog
While the man was in coma for six weeks, the girl used to visit him regularily. She never forgot to look first through the glas window, through which every patient of the intensice care station could be seen already from the corridor. Only when there were no signs of other visitors did she quickly slipped in and kissed him on his forehead. His respiratory mask kept her away from trying to kiss other parts of his face. He look a bit wild, it was obvious that the clinic nurses did not had enough time to shave the patients every day or comb their hair. She used to carry some refreshing towels with her and at least could wipe away the grit from his eyes and the sweat, that despite the air-conditioned atmosphere always collected on his forhead. Of the refreshing-towels she had a large stock, collected on a flight home to Stockholm, for which he had erroneously booked her a regular SAS-flight instead of the Ryan-Air she used to buy. Because he then refused to accept money from her for this overprized flight, she decided to steal as many items from the SAS-company as possible, among them were hundreds of refreshing towels. Now, more than 2 month after this flight, they could finally serve for a good purpose, although their smell was cheap and she always had to splash a fair amount of an aftershave on it, that she had bought for him the day right after the accident.
Having finished this bit of cosmetics, she took his hands and talked to him about the progress of her project. She had refused to accept any other supervisor after his accident, and told everybody in the university that she discussed with him all issues of gene mapping in outcrossed mice and of the thyroid-hormon regulation long before the accident and that the thesis were in principle ready. In reality, however, she still had many questions to ask him, and this she did while visiting him in the clinic. The personel of the intensive-care unit was happy about any visitor seeing a patient. They had modified the strickt german rule for visiting-times in hospitals a long time ago, when a young neurologist had explained them that without exposure to the diurnal cycle, as it is clearly the case in coma-patients, a person adopts its own circadian rhythm that runs out-of-phase relative to the normal day-and-night cycle. It lags per day about 11 min relative to the normal day-and-night cycle, and this would cause the patient after several weeks to run its internal sleep-and-wake-rhythm completely asynchronous to the external time. The doctors were initially sceptical about this apparently very theoretical assumption. But they agreed to give it a trial and allowed visitors to see the coma-patients round the clock. Only when they recognised that the patients clearly benefitted from visitors coming day and night, they decided to drop the old law.
Therefore, the girl used to come to the clinic whenever she had a problem during her scientific work. While she sat next to him, grabbing his hand and explaining what she wanted to know, she frequently observed that behind his closed eye-lids a rapid movement started. She once had prepared for her MSc course a scientific talk about this so called REM-sleep, during which sleep goes through a shallow phase and vivid dreams happen. She remembered that neurological studies concluded that these short phases of REM-sleep were essential for processing the empirical memory into long-term fixed experience. It serves to build an integral image in our brain of the world around us.
And every night while we sleep, the observations and experiences from the last day are checked and evaluated and trimmed during the REM-phase to fit them into the already existing integral conception of the world. In one of the review articles the author used as an allegory for what is happening during REM-phase sleep the computer-game thetris, in which single bricks of various irregular shape fall down onto a pre-existing odly shaped wall, and where the player has quickly to decide how to turn around and shift the falling bricks to the left or to the right in order to find a matching place for each of them on the wall. Once the new brick has been fixed on top of the wall, it is now part of the entire building and itself determines how the next falling bricks have to be twisted and shifted to integrate them, too. What she did not know, it was merely the sound of her dark voice that caused the intense mental activity in his brain, the sound of her voice activated a much stronger and complex neuronal processes than the simple scientific questions. In his integral concept of life and world, incorporating 49 years of personal experience, the dark sound of the girl voice together with her full curly hair and her blue-eyes were a rather new experience, in terms of the tetris game they came very late on an almost finished wall of thousands of earlier memories. Albeit the late occurrence of the impression she made on him, which started just 5 month before the accident, they shook up his entire pre-existing system of judgements, values, and goals. And this struggle of the fresh and vivid pictures of her - his memory recalled them immediately after hearing her voice - with the very established system of fixed intellectual values resulting from more than 4 decades of experience, was clearly visible by very intense REM-activity.
The girl, however, thought that in his mind he was arguing about issues of her scientific project, and that he might have severe objections about her interpretation of the genetic experiments. The more she was relieved when she came home after the visit and found on her e-mail account a message from an unknown sender, called "radius@persian-cat.de", who in every detail discussed to her the questions she had asked the man in the coma-station an hour ago. These letters by e-mail arrived now almost daily. They always started with "Dear Mrs. F." and finished "Take Care, yours radius of the persian cat". Who was the person writing them remains unclear till now. Was somebody from the clinic personel listening to her talking to him, and now made a joke to her ? But where from should this person got her mail-address ? How could it be that the messages always arrived in her mail-box not later than one hour after she left the hospital, does not matter whether it was 9 o"clock in the morning when she visited him before work or 11 o"clock at night, when she could not sleep and felt the desire to talk to him. Although the emergency-station was always open for her, the nurses and doctors seemed to change a lot. There was hardly anybody among the personel whom she saw more than two or three times, let alone anybody who was there every day and night over a period of 6 weeks. Some details of the messages let her assume, that a person with a minimal knowledge of their relationship must have been the sender.
Her persian family name F. was known at least in the institute, and he once threatened her for fun to call her always Mrs.F, unless she ceases to call him Dr. R. He mentioned that although it would be against the rules in the institute to call each other by last name, he liked the idea to refer to highly adored person as Mrs. F. The second detail of the messages were the strange senders identity, radius of the persian-cat. Persian cat would clearly refer to her background, but there were not many people knowing this. He asked her already very soon after they met the first time on the glacier of the Zugspitze, where he gave lectures to her course during a four-days retreat in the Schneeferner-Haus. There he said that she does not look very swedisch and asked if she would accept three guesses. After the first two guesses were wrong (later he agreed that she had neither the sharp face contoures of greek woman nore the full lips of the jewish), he was finally right in trying "Persia". It was also up there on the glacier where she recognised a scarf along his left wrist, and was told that this stems from a skying-accident two years ago, during which he broke his the radius bone. Of course, "radius of the persian cat" could have a lot of alternative meanings, could be that a cat draws a circle around her belly using her tail as a brush, or it could have a zoological meaning refering to the territory that a single persian cat occupies. Or it could describe the distance, over which a person nick-named Persian Cat attracts men.
Who ever was the sender of these e-mails, the parts refering to her science project were always so clearly written that some of them she just copy-and-pasted into her thesis. To satisfy the rules of scientifc honesty, she mentioned help from "radius of the persian cat" on the top of the acknowledgements. The thesis were given a grade of distinction by the board of reviewers.
Having finished this bit of cosmetics, she took his hands and talked to him about the progress of her project. She had refused to accept any other supervisor after his accident, and told everybody in the university that she discussed with him all issues of gene mapping in outcrossed mice and of the thyroid-hormon regulation long before the accident and that the thesis were in principle ready. In reality, however, she still had many questions to ask him, and this she did while visiting him in the clinic. The personel of the intensive-care unit was happy about any visitor seeing a patient. They had modified the strickt german rule for visiting-times in hospitals a long time ago, when a young neurologist had explained them that without exposure to the diurnal cycle, as it is clearly the case in coma-patients, a person adopts its own circadian rhythm that runs out-of-phase relative to the normal day-and-night cycle. It lags per day about 11 min relative to the normal day-and-night cycle, and this would cause the patient after several weeks to run its internal sleep-and-wake-rhythm completely asynchronous to the external time. The doctors were initially sceptical about this apparently very theoretical assumption. But they agreed to give it a trial and allowed visitors to see the coma-patients round the clock. Only when they recognised that the patients clearly benefitted from visitors coming day and night, they decided to drop the old law.
Therefore, the girl used to come to the clinic whenever she had a problem during her scientific work. While she sat next to him, grabbing his hand and explaining what she wanted to know, she frequently observed that behind his closed eye-lids a rapid movement started. She once had prepared for her MSc course a scientific talk about this so called REM-sleep, during which sleep goes through a shallow phase and vivid dreams happen. She remembered that neurological studies concluded that these short phases of REM-sleep were essential for processing the empirical memory into long-term fixed experience. It serves to build an integral image in our brain of the world around us.
And every night while we sleep, the observations and experiences from the last day are checked and evaluated and trimmed during the REM-phase to fit them into the already existing integral conception of the world. In one of the review articles the author used as an allegory for what is happening during REM-phase sleep the computer-game thetris, in which single bricks of various irregular shape fall down onto a pre-existing odly shaped wall, and where the player has quickly to decide how to turn around and shift the falling bricks to the left or to the right in order to find a matching place for each of them on the wall. Once the new brick has been fixed on top of the wall, it is now part of the entire building and itself determines how the next falling bricks have to be twisted and shifted to integrate them, too. What she did not know, it was merely the sound of her dark voice that caused the intense mental activity in his brain, the sound of her voice activated a much stronger and complex neuronal processes than the simple scientific questions. In his integral concept of life and world, incorporating 49 years of personal experience, the dark sound of the girl voice together with her full curly hair and her blue-eyes were a rather new experience, in terms of the tetris game they came very late on an almost finished wall of thousands of earlier memories. Albeit the late occurrence of the impression she made on him, which started just 5 month before the accident, they shook up his entire pre-existing system of judgements, values, and goals. And this struggle of the fresh and vivid pictures of her - his memory recalled them immediately after hearing her voice - with the very established system of fixed intellectual values resulting from more than 4 decades of experience, was clearly visible by very intense REM-activity.
The girl, however, thought that in his mind he was arguing about issues of her scientific project, and that he might have severe objections about her interpretation of the genetic experiments. The more she was relieved when she came home after the visit and found on her e-mail account a message from an unknown sender, called "radius@persian-cat.de", who in every detail discussed to her the questions she had asked the man in the coma-station an hour ago. These letters by e-mail arrived now almost daily. They always started with "Dear Mrs. F." and finished "Take Care, yours radius of the persian cat". Who was the person writing them remains unclear till now. Was somebody from the clinic personel listening to her talking to him, and now made a joke to her ? But where from should this person got her mail-address ? How could it be that the messages always arrived in her mail-box not later than one hour after she left the hospital, does not matter whether it was 9 o"clock in the morning when she visited him before work or 11 o"clock at night, when she could not sleep and felt the desire to talk to him. Although the emergency-station was always open for her, the nurses and doctors seemed to change a lot. There was hardly anybody among the personel whom she saw more than two or three times, let alone anybody who was there every day and night over a period of 6 weeks. Some details of the messages let her assume, that a person with a minimal knowledge of their relationship must have been the sender.
Her persian family name F. was known at least in the institute, and he once threatened her for fun to call her always Mrs.F, unless she ceases to call him Dr. R. He mentioned that although it would be against the rules in the institute to call each other by last name, he liked the idea to refer to highly adored person as Mrs. F. The second detail of the messages were the strange senders identity, radius of the persian-cat. Persian cat would clearly refer to her background, but there were not many people knowing this. He asked her already very soon after they met the first time on the glacier of the Zugspitze, where he gave lectures to her course during a four-days retreat in the Schneeferner-Haus. There he said that she does not look very swedisch and asked if she would accept three guesses. After the first two guesses were wrong (later he agreed that she had neither the sharp face contoures of greek woman nore the full lips of the jewish), he was finally right in trying "Persia". It was also up there on the glacier where she recognised a scarf along his left wrist, and was told that this stems from a skying-accident two years ago, during which he broke his the radius bone. Of course, "radius of the persian cat" could have a lot of alternative meanings, could be that a cat draws a circle around her belly using her tail as a brush, or it could have a zoological meaning refering to the territory that a single persian cat occupies. Or it could describe the distance, over which a person nick-named Persian Cat attracts men.
Who ever was the sender of these e-mails, the parts refering to her science project were always so clearly written that some of them she just copy-and-pasted into her thesis. To satisfy the rules of scientifc honesty, she mentioned help from "radius of the persian cat" on the top of the acknowledgements. The thesis were given a grade of distinction by the board of reviewers.
18.7.10
Falling Down
Hi Ghazal,
Thank you for the very condensed e-mail from yesterday. One could see, you have been very bussy or in a hurry. I hope it was it worth.
I think the weekend wont be as hot any more, therefore you probably wont miss the electric vent a lot.
The Summertheater was very nice, I like this open-air atmosphere under a the sky at night a lot. In particular, since there was lightning from a far thunderstorm the whole three hours through, and this gave the Shakespeare comedy "As you like it" a bit of an infernal taste. You might not know the play, and I"m not sure if you would like it, although it has a clearly defined happy end. But before, it shows and dissects the stereotypic human characters of desire, cheating and vain, and how it ends in devotion and surrender. It is amazing, how Shakespeare could described this 400 years ago in a manner, that stills appeares quite up-to-date.
During waiting two hours for the play to start (one has to go there hours in advance to get a good seat) I met two friends who run a music club in Munich. They told me they had just been to the 3rd serie of the Stieg Larsson movie. They also had seen the two earlier parts, and I asked them about the plot. To be honest, I decided not to see it and I also wont read the books. I hate the idea to make a thrilling story out of something cruel. For me, such kind of violence against kids, girls or woman is sick, absolutely sick, and is just a case for psychatric research, not for a mass-audience in the cinema or book-shop. I mean I like crime-stories a lot, but only if they are based on a "healthy crime", like stealing a million of dollars, mafia-type crime to gain power over a country or a city of gold, or men-killing-men because they love the same woman: these all would be crimes I can understand, therefore I can identify myself with the characters of the movie.
But if the whole plot starts with killing or turturing a young woman for nothing or for fun, I"ll be frustrated and would feel ill the whole film through. So it is definitly not my film. I had the same frustration when I once saw "The silence of the Lambs", with Anthony Hopkins and Judy Forster (whom I both like very much in other movies). But in this particular film, it was just violence of a psychatric monster, who like to bite others in the face and eat peoples flesh. I was terrified and left the cinema after 15 minutes. Since I don"t need this to happen again, nobody (not even you) will convince me to go to a Stieg Larsson movie.
If I want to see a thrilling crime movie, I better wait for the next serie of "Bourne Identity" or "Oceans 14" or "Godfather" or "A history of violence" featuring Vicco Mortensen or "Gangs of New York" or the like. Those movies, I can perfectly follow and understand, cause they show sort of sympathic criminals which only commit crime because they live in a sick society (in which money means everything and where one has to rule over others and where there are never enough nice and lovely woman for every man). You know under other circumstances, these criminals would be very nice and lovely persons and could work as teacher or doctor or waiter in a restaurant. They are not mentally sick, they are healthy and strong and don"t have to commit crime for fun, they only turned into criminals to fight against the circumstances.
Sorry again for this long epistle, I"m sure you wont agree and perhaps did not even read it to the end. Does not matter.
Anyhow, enjoy the weekend
Take Care Michael
PS: The form you have to ask for in Unterschleissheim Rathaus is called "Freizügigkeitsbescheinigung". It is supposed to be a yellow paper. Just bring it to the lab, I can fill it out for you. The Rathaus (I think englisch would be called Town-Hall or Registry-Office) will open at 8 a.m.
..........................................................................................................
hi michael,
im happy you had fun at the theater and that you met some friends.
okay then you shouldnt read or watch stieg larsson. cause yes it has one scene where a man rapes her or something, but then she will hurt him back later. but this is nothing for you then.
i was planning to give a talk about sleep , but if you wanr you can talk a bit more about rem phase? the slides you gave me maybe you want to give a talk about them?
take care
/ghazal
..........................................................................................................
Hi Ghazal,
Hope you are well up and progress with your talk. It is o.k. if you talk just about sleep and I take the part about dreams and REM.
I took the Brittanica to the Institute today, and put the copies of the sleep-article on your desk.
I"ll probably live in my office the next few days, because we have decided with my wife it is better to separate. 20 years together were definitely a few years to much.
I will go later to the center, to hear a concert. In case you want to meet, I"ll be at 8 p.m. at Karlsplatz near the McDonalds..
Don"t worry, everything is fine (it only can get better).
Michael
...........................................................................................................
hi michael!
i am so chocked .. why do you want to separate? is it not good between you? it is so sad, after so many years. dont you want to try and work it out? what about your son..
thank you for the papers.. i will have a look at them on monday. so i will talk about sleep and the phases, and shortly just mention REM. and then you can talk more abour REM? i think you will do a great presentation about it.
about the concert, i think i stay home.. have fun michael.. and enjoy.
/ghazal
..........................................................................................................
Hi Ghazal,
I was very reliefed when I read that you were chocked. This means that you firmly believe in love, in good human values and in the possibility of a final happy end. I so much hope that you will never ever loose this thrust. To be honest, I also believe in these values (deep inside and on the long run), but in this special situation the values were already damaged over years and it is better in everybodys interest to make a clear stop now.
Only this summer I understoud how easy and wunderful and enlightening life can be, if you are together with someone with whom you share similar thoughts even without many words.
O.k. I have to accept that this is not possible with you, Ghazal, but it will be possible with someone else (even it is just my dog or my guitar). But continue to live with someone only to fight every day makes me completely sick and dull.
Don"t worry, my Dear. I have to be very grateful to you.
Michael
...........................................................................................................
hi michael,
i do not know if love with happy ending exists, but i want it to exist. i havent been in a good relationship so far. but hopefully maybe i will. but i can understand that life is much better alone than with someone you fight with all the time. ive been through it and feel much much happier alone. you are not acctually alone, you fill life with other nice things, in your case;family (ur son is important), guitar, dog, your family in berlin, your friends, your work. all these can make you happy. and then someday maybe true love will come, but nothing that one should think about and feel sad about all the time.
i know that its hard, but if there is someway to fix it between u and ur wife i would recommend it. but if there is not then i hope u will be fine.. the hardest part is in the beginning.
take care michael, u deserve only good things in life. hope you are enjoying the concert.
/ghazal
..........................................................................................................
Ghazal, my Dear,
I was so happy reading your encouraging letter after I came back from the concert. I feel a bit guilty that, because of me, you now have to worry about these sad things. You should not spoil your young life with such problems, better hear nice music, watch a funny movie and enjoy life. And one day somebody will come, I"m sure, and will carry you on his hands.
On the other hand, I think, love might come easy in the beginning, but later it always requires some effort from both sides, otherwise it might got lost again.
Thanks for your warm words, they are really very important for me. It is strange, I almost forget that they come from a girl that is 24 years younger than me, I rather feel that we have changed sides and you are currently supervising me (who appears to be very very naiv).
Sleep well, my dear
Michael
PS: I just had dinner. Your chocolate was delicious.
Thank you for the very condensed e-mail from yesterday. One could see, you have been very bussy or in a hurry. I hope it was it worth.
I think the weekend wont be as hot any more, therefore you probably wont miss the electric vent a lot.
The Summertheater was very nice, I like this open-air atmosphere under a the sky at night a lot. In particular, since there was lightning from a far thunderstorm the whole three hours through, and this gave the Shakespeare comedy "As you like it" a bit of an infernal taste. You might not know the play, and I"m not sure if you would like it, although it has a clearly defined happy end. But before, it shows and dissects the stereotypic human characters of desire, cheating and vain, and how it ends in devotion and surrender. It is amazing, how Shakespeare could described this 400 years ago in a manner, that stills appeares quite up-to-date.
During waiting two hours for the play to start (one has to go there hours in advance to get a good seat) I met two friends who run a music club in Munich. They told me they had just been to the 3rd serie of the Stieg Larsson movie. They also had seen the two earlier parts, and I asked them about the plot. To be honest, I decided not to see it and I also wont read the books. I hate the idea to make a thrilling story out of something cruel. For me, such kind of violence against kids, girls or woman is sick, absolutely sick, and is just a case for psychatric research, not for a mass-audience in the cinema or book-shop. I mean I like crime-stories a lot, but only if they are based on a "healthy crime", like stealing a million of dollars, mafia-type crime to gain power over a country or a city of gold, or men-killing-men because they love the same woman: these all would be crimes I can understand, therefore I can identify myself with the characters of the movie.
But if the whole plot starts with killing or turturing a young woman for nothing or for fun, I"ll be frustrated and would feel ill the whole film through. So it is definitly not my film. I had the same frustration when I once saw "The silence of the Lambs", with Anthony Hopkins and Judy Forster (whom I both like very much in other movies). But in this particular film, it was just violence of a psychatric monster, who like to bite others in the face and eat peoples flesh. I was terrified and left the cinema after 15 minutes. Since I don"t need this to happen again, nobody (not even you) will convince me to go to a Stieg Larsson movie.
If I want to see a thrilling crime movie, I better wait for the next serie of "Bourne Identity" or "Oceans 14" or "Godfather" or "A history of violence" featuring Vicco Mortensen or "Gangs of New York" or the like. Those movies, I can perfectly follow and understand, cause they show sort of sympathic criminals which only commit crime because they live in a sick society (in which money means everything and where one has to rule over others and where there are never enough nice and lovely woman for every man). You know under other circumstances, these criminals would be very nice and lovely persons and could work as teacher or doctor or waiter in a restaurant. They are not mentally sick, they are healthy and strong and don"t have to commit crime for fun, they only turned into criminals to fight against the circumstances.
Sorry again for this long epistle, I"m sure you wont agree and perhaps did not even read it to the end. Does not matter.
Anyhow, enjoy the weekend
Take Care Michael
PS: The form you have to ask for in Unterschleissheim Rathaus is called "Freizügigkeitsbescheinigung". It is supposed to be a yellow paper. Just bring it to the lab, I can fill it out for you. The Rathaus (I think englisch would be called Town-Hall or Registry-Office) will open at 8 a.m.
..........................................................................................................
hi michael,
im happy you had fun at the theater and that you met some friends.
okay then you shouldnt read or watch stieg larsson. cause yes it has one scene where a man rapes her or something, but then she will hurt him back later. but this is nothing for you then.
i was planning to give a talk about sleep , but if you wanr you can talk a bit more about rem phase? the slides you gave me maybe you want to give a talk about them?
take care
/ghazal
..........................................................................................................
Hi Ghazal,
Hope you are well up and progress with your talk. It is o.k. if you talk just about sleep and I take the part about dreams and REM.
I took the Brittanica to the Institute today, and put the copies of the sleep-article on your desk.
I"ll probably live in my office the next few days, because we have decided with my wife it is better to separate. 20 years together were definitely a few years to much.
I will go later to the center, to hear a concert. In case you want to meet, I"ll be at 8 p.m. at Karlsplatz near the McDonalds..
Don"t worry, everything is fine (it only can get better).
Michael
...........................................................................................................
hi michael!
i am so chocked .. why do you want to separate? is it not good between you? it is so sad, after so many years. dont you want to try and work it out? what about your son..
thank you for the papers.. i will have a look at them on monday. so i will talk about sleep and the phases, and shortly just mention REM. and then you can talk more abour REM? i think you will do a great presentation about it.
about the concert, i think i stay home.. have fun michael.. and enjoy.
/ghazal
..........................................................................................................
Hi Ghazal,
I was very reliefed when I read that you were chocked. This means that you firmly believe in love, in good human values and in the possibility of a final happy end. I so much hope that you will never ever loose this thrust. To be honest, I also believe in these values (deep inside and on the long run), but in this special situation the values were already damaged over years and it is better in everybodys interest to make a clear stop now.
Only this summer I understoud how easy and wunderful and enlightening life can be, if you are together with someone with whom you share similar thoughts even without many words.
O.k. I have to accept that this is not possible with you, Ghazal, but it will be possible with someone else (even it is just my dog or my guitar). But continue to live with someone only to fight every day makes me completely sick and dull.
Don"t worry, my Dear. I have to be very grateful to you.
Michael
...........................................................................................................
hi michael,
i do not know if love with happy ending exists, but i want it to exist. i havent been in a good relationship so far. but hopefully maybe i will. but i can understand that life is much better alone than with someone you fight with all the time. ive been through it and feel much much happier alone. you are not acctually alone, you fill life with other nice things, in your case;family (ur son is important), guitar, dog, your family in berlin, your friends, your work. all these can make you happy. and then someday maybe true love will come, but nothing that one should think about and feel sad about all the time.
i know that its hard, but if there is someway to fix it between u and ur wife i would recommend it. but if there is not then i hope u will be fine.. the hardest part is in the beginning.
take care michael, u deserve only good things in life. hope you are enjoying the concert.
/ghazal
..........................................................................................................
Ghazal, my Dear,
I was so happy reading your encouraging letter after I came back from the concert. I feel a bit guilty that, because of me, you now have to worry about these sad things. You should not spoil your young life with such problems, better hear nice music, watch a funny movie and enjoy life. And one day somebody will come, I"m sure, and will carry you on his hands.
On the other hand, I think, love might come easy in the beginning, but later it always requires some effort from both sides, otherwise it might got lost again.
Thanks for your warm words, they are really very important for me. It is strange, I almost forget that they come from a girl that is 24 years younger than me, I rather feel that we have changed sides and you are currently supervising me (who appears to be very very naiv).
Sleep well, my dear
Michael
PS: I just had dinner. Your chocolate was delicious.
16.7.10
Unicorn and the blue-eyed camel
10 min after midnight he could not wait any longer for the long over-due end-of-the-day message from her. He left the house, the family, the dog and the garden behind and drove to her, ignoring most of the red traffic-lights and speed limits. After a 15 min race from the very east to the very north of this town, a drive that normally would take an hour, he felt absolutely confident that she was waiting for him. And in fact, hers was the only window in the apartment house that was open and with the lights still on. Therefore, after calling her name twice from downstairs, she appeared behind the curtain, first as a shadow but soon clearly shown dressed in white cotton and satin, holding a telefon. And almost as children would do when one stands downstairs on the ground and the other leans out of his window upstairs, she asked probably the most typical question for a child "Shall I come down ?". Apparently, the telefon call in the middle of the night was not so important for her, since first think she did was to press the Hang-Up button, before putting her beige trench-coat over the white shirt. Now he could see for the first time where her grandmom had stitched the rip in the coat. It was indeed done was great skills, and already now he should have understand how intense the relations between her and her family must have been, and that his rather spiritual feeling of love could hardly ever compete with this.
When he drove back, it must have happend at the narrow part of the road, where again like several times before, the young light-grey foal was standing. He had completely forgotten than he was not riding the bike tonight, which would have allowed an easy to maneuvering around the foal, but that now he was driving a car that was almost as wide as the entire road. The high speed for sure would have made a rapid break useless, so instinctively he turn the wheel to the left and ended at the corner-wall of the villages cemetry. Without the seat-belts on, he must have immediately crashed his head into the wind-screen. That was at least what the police wrote in their report. He woke up 6 weeks later in an intensive care station for coma-patients. After the first few days of this new life passed by with doctors doing tests all over his brain and body, a police inspector appeared for a few questions. The inspector wrote down what the man recalled about the accident, but strange enough, he insisted it was not a light-grey foal of the horse-farm that made him crashing into the cemetries wall, but that a white unicorn was galopping in front of him. Several times the inspector questioned this, and in particular after he visited the location himself came along with the idea that I might have been misled by a horse from the nearby ranch. After refusing any such suggestions, they next send a psychologist and neurologist, first to collect hundreds of questions about his mental state and potential excessive-phantasies, for which they apologized saying they have seen a dramatic rise of halluzinations in this hot summer 2010. After finding out that he was exceptionally realistic and rejected any idea of an extrasensual world, and that he even reacted angry when they asked him about his spiritual experience with the holy god, they also called a neurologist. His job was to find out if and to what degree the man had experiences with halluzinogenic drugs. Of course the doctor was sure that the man was a blunt liar insisting, that he never in life had tried any drugs, because he could get high immediately by either listening to Jimmi Hendrix, or by diving deep into science, or by spending some hours with a girl. The neurologist confirmed him, that there are indeed people (unfortunately not many) that have a genetic "abnormality" in their serotonin and their dopamin regulation that enables them to get into euphoria by intentionally choosing one ore several intellectual stimuli.
And that this can happen by the obsession to adored person was not by chanced claimed again and again by singers from Frank Sinatra over Dalia Lavi and Hildegard Knef to youngsters like Jamie Cullum.
Dalia Lavi "Das haut mich nicht um"
Hildegard Knef "Das haut mich nicht um"
Frank Sinatra "I get a kick out of you"
Interested to know who or what in this special case might be the source of this conscious-driven endorphine release in the man, the neurologist insisted to stay until he has seen a picture of the girl. Since the mans hand were still severly impaired, he had to spell letter-by-letter the URL http:persian-cat.de, where behind a hidden link on the first blog-entry. the one describing the encounter of the two on the Zugspitz Glacier, line after line the girls face appeared on the screen. The neurologist, who had served as WHO aide in the first Gulf war and who was involved in a large survey studying the increase of neurological disorders among the iran civilians during this 10 year long conflict, was strucked when he saw her blue eyes. As part of his neorological survey on the war-affected iranian people he also measured the pupillary light reflex in perhaps more than 8000 patients of all ages, ethnicities and socio-eoconomic groups. He could recalled iris colours of all shades of brown, from an almost dark green over light-tea, yellow-brownish to and a deep, almost black colour. There where, however cases, in particular among the zoroastrian minority, which harboured a few light-blue segments among an otherwise brown iris. And when he asked these few patients if they new of close relatives with a similar pattern they denied this, explaining to him that this has nothing to do with family relationships, but with a legendary golden and blue-eyed camel-cow, on which their Prophet Zarathustra managed to escape the rising waters of the deluge. This deluge, accoring to the Epic of Gilgamesh, happend thousands of years before in the low-lands north of the Taurus Mountains, an area we now know as the black sea. According to legend of the Zoroastrians, the two, Zarathustra and the golden, blue-eyed camel were the only two survivors of the big flood, and consequently they gave rise to a new specie that soon populated large parts of the middle east from Aserbaidshan, through Persia up to the indian sub-continent. Over the generations and by mixing with other tribes and etnicities, the Zarathustrians inherited almost every gene variant that is common among the aryan people in Persia, except the few blue fibres that were sometimes still visible in their iris. And these few blue spots always reminded them on their unique origin and their historical relationship with the young camel-cow, who saved their prophet from drowning. As an ever-lasting promise to them, the legend predicted than once a young girl will be born, that unlike all other kids wont loose the blue colour of its iris. And this girl will unite the traditional wisdom of the Zoroastrian people with a modern and enlightend intelligence.
Could it be, that this young girl for whom millions of Zoroastrinas all over the world were waiting since thousands of year, had taken refuge just here somewhere in northern or middle european, maybe washed away by a deluge that happened in the 20th century and was not mythologic, but very real and that chased the persian nation away by an endless chain of military putsches, oeconomic exploitations by the US and british, the complete humiliation of freedom and humanity by the 1979 islamic revolution follow by attempted attacks by CIA and an 10 years long war with the neighboured Irak, to which the US had given their "Go" to Sadam Hussein.
When he drove back, it must have happend at the narrow part of the road, where again like several times before, the young light-grey foal was standing. He had completely forgotten than he was not riding the bike tonight, which would have allowed an easy to maneuvering around the foal, but that now he was driving a car that was almost as wide as the entire road. The high speed for sure would have made a rapid break useless, so instinctively he turn the wheel to the left and ended at the corner-wall of the villages cemetry. Without the seat-belts on, he must have immediately crashed his head into the wind-screen. That was at least what the police wrote in their report. He woke up 6 weeks later in an intensive care station for coma-patients. After the first few days of this new life passed by with doctors doing tests all over his brain and body, a police inspector appeared for a few questions. The inspector wrote down what the man recalled about the accident, but strange enough, he insisted it was not a light-grey foal of the horse-farm that made him crashing into the cemetries wall, but that a white unicorn was galopping in front of him. Several times the inspector questioned this, and in particular after he visited the location himself came along with the idea that I might have been misled by a horse from the nearby ranch. After refusing any such suggestions, they next send a psychologist and neurologist, first to collect hundreds of questions about his mental state and potential excessive-phantasies, for which they apologized saying they have seen a dramatic rise of halluzinations in this hot summer 2010. After finding out that he was exceptionally realistic and rejected any idea of an extrasensual world, and that he even reacted angry when they asked him about his spiritual experience with the holy god, they also called a neurologist. His job was to find out if and to what degree the man had experiences with halluzinogenic drugs. Of course the doctor was sure that the man was a blunt liar insisting, that he never in life had tried any drugs, because he could get high immediately by either listening to Jimmi Hendrix, or by diving deep into science, or by spending some hours with a girl. The neurologist confirmed him, that there are indeed people (unfortunately not many) that have a genetic "abnormality" in their serotonin and their dopamin regulation that enables them to get into euphoria by intentionally choosing one ore several intellectual stimuli.
And that this can happen by the obsession to adored person was not by chanced claimed again and again by singers from Frank Sinatra over Dalia Lavi and Hildegard Knef to youngsters like Jamie Cullum.
Dalia Lavi "Das haut mich nicht um"
Hildegard Knef "Das haut mich nicht um"
Frank Sinatra "I get a kick out of you"
Interested to know who or what in this special case might be the source of this conscious-driven endorphine release in the man, the neurologist insisted to stay until he has seen a picture of the girl. Since the mans hand were still severly impaired, he had to spell letter-by-letter the URL http:persian-cat.de, where behind a hidden link on the first blog-entry. the one describing the encounter of the two on the Zugspitz Glacier, line after line the girls face appeared on the screen. The neurologist, who had served as WHO aide in the first Gulf war and who was involved in a large survey studying the increase of neurological disorders among the iran civilians during this 10 year long conflict, was strucked when he saw her blue eyes. As part of his neorological survey on the war-affected iranian people he also measured the pupillary light reflex in perhaps more than 8000 patients of all ages, ethnicities and socio-eoconomic groups. He could recalled iris colours of all shades of brown, from an almost dark green over light-tea, yellow-brownish to and a deep, almost black colour. There where, however cases, in particular among the zoroastrian minority, which harboured a few light-blue segments among an otherwise brown iris. And when he asked these few patients if they new of close relatives with a similar pattern they denied this, explaining to him that this has nothing to do with family relationships, but with a legendary golden and blue-eyed camel-cow, on which their Prophet Zarathustra managed to escape the rising waters of the deluge. This deluge, accoring to the Epic of Gilgamesh, happend thousands of years before in the low-lands north of the Taurus Mountains, an area we now know as the black sea. According to legend of the Zoroastrians, the two, Zarathustra and the golden, blue-eyed camel were the only two survivors of the big flood, and consequently they gave rise to a new specie that soon populated large parts of the middle east from Aserbaidshan, through Persia up to the indian sub-continent. Over the generations and by mixing with other tribes and etnicities, the Zarathustrians inherited almost every gene variant that is common among the aryan people in Persia, except the few blue fibres that were sometimes still visible in their iris. And these few blue spots always reminded them on their unique origin and their historical relationship with the young camel-cow, who saved their prophet from drowning. As an ever-lasting promise to them, the legend predicted than once a young girl will be born, that unlike all other kids wont loose the blue colour of its iris. And this girl will unite the traditional wisdom of the Zoroastrian people with a modern and enlightend intelligence.
Could it be, that this young girl for whom millions of Zoroastrinas all over the world were waiting since thousands of year, had taken refuge just here somewhere in northern or middle european, maybe washed away by a deluge that happened in the 20th century and was not mythologic, but very real and that chased the persian nation away by an endless chain of military putsches, oeconomic exploitations by the US and british, the complete humiliation of freedom and humanity by the 1979 islamic revolution follow by attempted attacks by CIA and an 10 years long war with the neighboured Irak, to which the US had given their "Go" to Sadam Hussein.
15.7.10
Rapid Eye Movement
Ghazal, my Dear, how are you ?
I came back from Pathology only at 5 p.m., too late to say bye to you. Therefore the only thing for me to do was to have a last look at the transfected cells (which were nicely red) and said "see you tomorrow, my faithful friends". Of course it is much easier to say "good night" to the cells (or to the mice), because I can close the door to the incubator (or the door to the mouse-house) and with 99.9999% probability, they will be still at the same place next morning.
When I say "Bye" to you in the evening, it is different. I don"t think that you will suddenly leave Munich for Stockholm with the last flight at night,
but I always afraid that the few month with you here in Munich will suddenly appear to be an illusion, an phantasy that happend only in my mind because it was fooled by this summer-wind and the smell of the lime-trees and music.
I can only speak for myself, but I can not remember to had such a nice day as yesterday when we explored the Olympia-Area. You can call me simple-minded, because I count these few hours in an ordinary park landscape so high. But you know, Ghazal, it is not that I haven"t been to more thrilling places. I"ve seen New York and San Francisco and New Orleans and Chicago, I"ve been to Tokio and Paris and Rom and whereever one has to go. I went Skiing in the Rocky Mountains and in the Swiss Alps and had an apartment in London. I have seen the Rolling Stones and the Who and Pink Floyd and Sherley Bessey. I can say, it all was a sort of interesting and exciting perhaps. But for non of these things I could say the same as for the hours I have been together with you here in this small-town of Munich:
That my life would be so much poorer without it.
I hope that you feel the same, I"ve got the impression that you do. I think it is alright, if we both profit from it.
Sleep well, my dear
Michael
PS:: It is a great idea to do the Pecha-Kucha talk about different sleep phases. I"ll try to make a vidoe shot of our dog while she is in REM-phase.
...............................................................................................
hi michael,
im fine. hope that u are fine as well.
yes these 2 and half more months will pass by quickly, time passes by quickly in general.
i read a bit about sleep. its interesting. if i can do it its good, or otherwise i do midsummer in sweden.
have a good night.
/ghazal
................................................................................................
Ghazal my dear,
Do you also have the intense thunder and lightning up there in Unter-Schleissheim ? Do you like it ? I begin to enjoy this unbound release of power.
Unfortunatly, our dog fears thunderstorm a lot, and therefore she probably wont pose today as a REM-phase model. But I"m absolutely positive, I will catch her asleep untill Monday.
Are you alright ? Please send me short note.
Michael
................................................................................................
hi,
yes we had some thunder and rain, but its over now i think.
poor dog that is afraid.
im alright and will sleep now, good night :)
................................................................................................
Hi Ghazal,
I red your message only now, after 1 a.m. You are perhaps already in your first REM-phase. It must look amazing, since your long eyelashes for sure will emphasize the flickering eye-movement dramaticallyl. You should also place a video-camera on your bed, so you would probably got the most tremendous demonstration of human REM.
By the way, I told our dog that you feel sorry for her fearing the thunderstorm. She got much quieter right away. And since she felt very grateful to you, she agreed to show some dog"s REM. What is funny, a dog not just moves the eye rapidly, but also the whiskers and the ears. I recorded everything, so you might include it into your talk.
For the rest of the night, I wish you a nice ballance between REM and non-REM phases.
Take Care to wake up in the morning during a non-REM phase. It is much much better.
Yours Michael
I came back from Pathology only at 5 p.m., too late to say bye to you. Therefore the only thing for me to do was to have a last look at the transfected cells (which were nicely red) and said "see you tomorrow, my faithful friends". Of course it is much easier to say "good night" to the cells (or to the mice), because I can close the door to the incubator (or the door to the mouse-house) and with 99.9999% probability, they will be still at the same place next morning.
When I say "Bye" to you in the evening, it is different. I don"t think that you will suddenly leave Munich for Stockholm with the last flight at night,
but I always afraid that the few month with you here in Munich will suddenly appear to be an illusion, an phantasy that happend only in my mind because it was fooled by this summer-wind and the smell of the lime-trees and music.
I can only speak for myself, but I can not remember to had such a nice day as yesterday when we explored the Olympia-Area. You can call me simple-minded, because I count these few hours in an ordinary park landscape so high. But you know, Ghazal, it is not that I haven"t been to more thrilling places. I"ve seen New York and San Francisco and New Orleans and Chicago, I"ve been to Tokio and Paris and Rom and whereever one has to go. I went Skiing in the Rocky Mountains and in the Swiss Alps and had an apartment in London. I have seen the Rolling Stones and the Who and Pink Floyd and Sherley Bessey. I can say, it all was a sort of interesting and exciting perhaps. But for non of these things I could say the same as for the hours I have been together with you here in this small-town of Munich:
That my life would be so much poorer without it.
I hope that you feel the same, I"ve got the impression that you do. I think it is alright, if we both profit from it.
Sleep well, my dear
Michael
PS:: It is a great idea to do the Pecha-Kucha talk about different sleep phases. I"ll try to make a vidoe shot of our dog while she is in REM-phase.
...............................................................................................
hi michael,
im fine. hope that u are fine as well.
yes these 2 and half more months will pass by quickly, time passes by quickly in general.
i read a bit about sleep. its interesting. if i can do it its good, or otherwise i do midsummer in sweden.
have a good night.
/ghazal
................................................................................................
Ghazal my dear,
Do you also have the intense thunder and lightning up there in Unter-Schleissheim ? Do you like it ? I begin to enjoy this unbound release of power.
Unfortunatly, our dog fears thunderstorm a lot, and therefore she probably wont pose today as a REM-phase model. But I"m absolutely positive, I will catch her asleep untill Monday.
Are you alright ? Please send me short note.
Michael
................................................................................................
hi,
yes we had some thunder and rain, but its over now i think.
poor dog that is afraid.
im alright and will sleep now, good night :)
................................................................................................
Hi Ghazal,
I red your message only now, after 1 a.m. You are perhaps already in your first REM-phase. It must look amazing, since your long eyelashes for sure will emphasize the flickering eye-movement dramaticallyl. You should also place a video-camera on your bed, so you would probably got the most tremendous demonstration of human REM.
By the way, I told our dog that you feel sorry for her fearing the thunderstorm. She got much quieter right away. And since she felt very grateful to you, she agreed to show some dog"s REM. What is funny, a dog not just moves the eye rapidly, but also the whiskers and the ears. I recorded everything, so you might include it into your talk.
For the rest of the night, I wish you a nice ballance between REM and non-REM phases.
Take Care to wake up in the morning during a non-REM phase. It is much much better.
Yours Michael
14.7.10
An evening up in the air of the Olympic-Tower
Hi Ghazal, my Dear,
I am sure you understand, that I don"t write you another long story tonight. Perhaps right from the beginning you had the suspicion that all these
hundreds of words I wrote you evening by evening were only there to cover up what I really felt for you. And of course my strange suggestions that you are an angel, coming from another world - well, that was probably the easiest way to avoid any firm statement on this. Sorry, I have to admit, I don"t have such a clear idea jet. When we are together, I"m always cought by dreams and I just wish these moments could last forever. I could stay with you on the plattform of the olympia-tower and see the world go round and round for the next hundred of years.
I"m happy that at least you, Ghazal, are much more realistic. I always admire your clear statements about things you like and others you don"t like.
In contrast to you, I always try some complex analysis, trying to consider if it is appropriate to like something or somebody. Thats why it took me a while before I found out that it is not only this phantasy of having met you and your parents 20 years ago in Berlin. This was perhaps just another secondary imagination, same as the Angel, the Traveler from outer space or the blue-eyed persian cat. What is behind all this phantasies is you, Ghazal, to whom I more and more fall in love. I don"t see anything bad in this, and whoever wants to condemn me for this is free to do so. And of course if you will ever say "leave me alone, don"t interfere with my life", I can"t and won"t do anything that is against your will.
Excuse me, I once again exceeded the size-limit of a short evening message.
I hope I don"t cause you insomnia (sleepless nights).
Relax, my dear, wish you a very intense REM-sleep and very long and relaxing non-REM sleep
Michael
I am sure you understand, that I don"t write you another long story tonight. Perhaps right from the beginning you had the suspicion that all these
hundreds of words I wrote you evening by evening were only there to cover up what I really felt for you. And of course my strange suggestions that you are an angel, coming from another world - well, that was probably the easiest way to avoid any firm statement on this. Sorry, I have to admit, I don"t have such a clear idea jet. When we are together, I"m always cought by dreams and I just wish these moments could last forever. I could stay with you on the plattform of the olympia-tower and see the world go round and round for the next hundred of years.
I"m happy that at least you, Ghazal, are much more realistic. I always admire your clear statements about things you like and others you don"t like.
In contrast to you, I always try some complex analysis, trying to consider if it is appropriate to like something or somebody. Thats why it took me a while before I found out that it is not only this phantasy of having met you and your parents 20 years ago in Berlin. This was perhaps just another secondary imagination, same as the Angel, the Traveler from outer space or the blue-eyed persian cat. What is behind all this phantasies is you, Ghazal, to whom I more and more fall in love. I don"t see anything bad in this, and whoever wants to condemn me for this is free to do so. And of course if you will ever say "leave me alone, don"t interfere with my life", I can"t and won"t do anything that is against your will.
Excuse me, I once again exceeded the size-limit of a short evening message.
I hope I don"t cause you insomnia (sleepless nights).
Relax, my dear, wish you a very intense REM-sleep and very long and relaxing non-REM sleep
Michael
12.7.10
Goethe, Hafiz and the Dangerous Love
Hi Ghazal,
In case you are in the mood for some time out today, send a message. I would be happy to accompany you to go to town or to the lake or whereever you want.
Otherwise, I will spend the day in the lab.
Take Care, my dear,
Michael
................................................................................................
Hi Michael,
yesterday i went to the centrum to look around a bit and then i was home and looked up some genes and saw the movie "a space odysseys". it was good. but i didnt like the ending. didnt understand.
today i was invited to omid to eat something and to watch the football.
i liked the story about the cat and the dog. good that they became friends at last.
ooh, you found a persian place. i think i saw it before in march, i missed it then as well. and also this time. yes maybe they will have something in august. thank you for finding the website.
have a good day
/ghazal
................................................................................................
Ghazal, my dear,
When I came to the institute today the first thing I recognized was your bike. You see I"m really crazy, the first thing I though was that you might have also come to the lab on Sunday. It would be a terrific thing, hoewever, if somebody as magnificent and young and charming as you would spend such a nice day here.
Later on I red your e-mail and I was absolut happy to hear that you had a nice program over the weekend. I can imagine how much you enjoyed to talk with Omid nand his family in your mothers tongue. I really would like to watch a vidoe-record of this evening (of course with english or german sub-titles), and I can imagine that it would remind me of some scenes from the movie "woman without man" (where the educated people meet and discuss about the meaning of life).
Ghazal, do you remember the picture on the exhibition we have been together, the one with the wooden floor and the two big sculptures in the corner. I told you it shows the house-museum of the biggest german poet/writer J.W.von Goethe. I completely forgot one aspect of Goethe: He was very much fascinated by the oriental poetry. I"m 100% sure one of his most personal collections of poems, called the "West-Eastern Divan", must have been translated into persian. Goethe absolutely adored the persian poet Hafiz. And the museum in Weimar (the one shown on the picture at the exhibition) was visited in the year 2000 by the late iranian president Khatami. But be careful, the report is published by a fundamentalist-marxist news-paper, which is a bit extreme in its opinion. However, everything they write about Goethe and his universalism and openess to oriental culture is o.k.
Another link for you, my dear, just to prove that not everything I tell you is phantasy, is this paper by Dutton and Aron about the psychological experiment on the dangerous bridge. You remember I told you about it when we crossed the "highway" with the dangerous traffic last week. The paper is so nicely and clearly written, I cannot imagine the two authors ever considered that two people crossing a dangerous street in Munich on a sunny Thursday in 2010 would consider their scientific conclusion relevant for their own situation.
I have to apologize ones again for this long and mind-blasting e-mail.
I wish you a relaxing evening and night.
Michael
In case you are in the mood for some time out today, send a message. I would be happy to accompany you to go to town or to the lake or whereever you want.
Otherwise, I will spend the day in the lab.
Take Care, my dear,
Michael
................................................................................................
Hi Michael,
yesterday i went to the centrum to look around a bit and then i was home and looked up some genes and saw the movie "a space odysseys". it was good. but i didnt like the ending. didnt understand.
today i was invited to omid to eat something and to watch the football.
i liked the story about the cat and the dog. good that they became friends at last.
ooh, you found a persian place. i think i saw it before in march, i missed it then as well. and also this time. yes maybe they will have something in august. thank you for finding the website.
have a good day
/ghazal
................................................................................................
Ghazal, my dear,
When I came to the institute today the first thing I recognized was your bike. You see I"m really crazy, the first thing I though was that you might have also come to the lab on Sunday. It would be a terrific thing, hoewever, if somebody as magnificent and young and charming as you would spend such a nice day here.
Later on I red your e-mail and I was absolut happy to hear that you had a nice program over the weekend. I can imagine how much you enjoyed to talk with Omid nand his family in your mothers tongue. I really would like to watch a vidoe-record of this evening (of course with english or german sub-titles), and I can imagine that it would remind me of some scenes from the movie "woman without man" (where the educated people meet and discuss about the meaning of life).
Ghazal, do you remember the picture on the exhibition we have been together, the one with the wooden floor and the two big sculptures in the corner. I told you it shows the house-museum of the biggest german poet/writer J.W.von Goethe. I completely forgot one aspect of Goethe: He was very much fascinated by the oriental poetry. I"m 100% sure one of his most personal collections of poems, called the "West-Eastern Divan", must have been translated into persian. Goethe absolutely adored the persian poet Hafiz. And the museum in Weimar (the one shown on the picture at the exhibition) was visited in the year 2000 by the late iranian president Khatami. But be careful, the report is published by a fundamentalist-marxist news-paper, which is a bit extreme in its opinion. However, everything they write about Goethe and his universalism and openess to oriental culture is o.k.
Another link for you, my dear, just to prove that not everything I tell you is phantasy, is this paper by Dutton and Aron about the psychological experiment on the dangerous bridge. You remember I told you about it when we crossed the "highway" with the dangerous traffic last week. The paper is so nicely and clearly written, I cannot imagine the two authors ever considered that two people crossing a dangerous street in Munich on a sunny Thursday in 2010 would consider their scientific conclusion relevant for their own situation.
I have to apologize ones again for this long and mind-blasting e-mail.
I wish you a relaxing evening and night.
Michael
10.7.10
Bitter Lemon Hypothesis rejected by Ghazal
Hi Ghazal, my Dear,
Are you already at home relaxing ? Have you found the delicious "Bitter Lemon" lemonade in your local store? The standard brand here would be from Schweppes (UK). But this is about 3 x more expensive than the ordinary Supermarket bottles that you tried today. And for my taste, Schweppes Bitter Lemon is a bit to strong (Maybe it is delicious up-in-the-air).
I am surprised that you enjoy this bitter taste. An interpretation from the neurologists would be, that you are very happy at the moment. Evolutionary, bitter taste was always a warning of something dangerous like poisened food or toxic plants. For animals, bitter taste is an alert signal and causes them some stress. This is perhaps the reason why people, if they have some stress or are unhappy, take some sweets (and eat too much of them). In german we have a phrase saying "who has got lots of trouble, also has got lots of liquor (thats a sweet alcoholic bevarage, usually disgusting)" .
However, if you eat or drink bitter stuff intentionally means you are very confident with life and emotionally high up, so you feel superior to the natural warning sign of a bitter taste.
Wow Ghazal, if this is right, you must be in the mood like a young goddess today. I keep my fingers crossed that you stay so happy till Monday (and of course for ever).
Take Care, my Dear If you feel lonely, send me an e-mail (but also if you are not lonely) . Even if you just send 5 words, I will understand.
Michael
...............................................................
Hi Michael,
No, I did not go to the supermarket to look for the drink. I"ll go there tomorrow. So I am happy because I liked the drink, hmmm well I"m happy but dont know if that theory is correct.
have a good night you too.
/ghazal
Are you already at home relaxing ? Have you found the delicious "Bitter Lemon" lemonade in your local store? The standard brand here would be from Schweppes (UK). But this is about 3 x more expensive than the ordinary Supermarket bottles that you tried today. And for my taste, Schweppes Bitter Lemon is a bit to strong (Maybe it is delicious up-in-the-air).
I am surprised that you enjoy this bitter taste. An interpretation from the neurologists would be, that you are very happy at the moment. Evolutionary, bitter taste was always a warning of something dangerous like poisened food or toxic plants. For animals, bitter taste is an alert signal and causes them some stress. This is perhaps the reason why people, if they have some stress or are unhappy, take some sweets (and eat too much of them). In german we have a phrase saying "who has got lots of trouble, also has got lots of liquor (thats a sweet alcoholic bevarage, usually disgusting)" .
However, if you eat or drink bitter stuff intentionally means you are very confident with life and emotionally high up, so you feel superior to the natural warning sign of a bitter taste.
Wow Ghazal, if this is right, you must be in the mood like a young goddess today. I keep my fingers crossed that you stay so happy till Monday (and of course for ever).
Take Care, my Dear If you feel lonely, send me an e-mail (but also if you are not lonely) . Even if you just send 5 words, I will understand.
Michael
...............................................................
Hi Michael,
No, I did not go to the supermarket to look for the drink. I"ll go there tomorrow. So I am happy because I liked the drink, hmmm well I"m happy but dont know if that theory is correct.
have a good night you too.
/ghazal
A Summer of Peace between Cat and Dog
Hi Ghazal, my Dear,
Did you had a nice day today? It was pretty hot, wasn"t it. Have you done something nice ? Could you enjoy the summer day ?
Did you recognise that the smell of the lime-trees (the ones we saw around the lake) is particular strong and long lasting this year ? I think this summer is special at all. I cant remember seeing the stars so clear and sparkling as this summer, I cant remember feeling the water of the lakes so smooth and tender and I never heard so much nice music as this summer. And of course I never before had the privileg to meet an angel being so inspiring and funny and mysterious as you are. In this respekt, we are quite different. I probably talk much to much (at least to you), and there is probably not much left that you might think is worth to hear. (Except for a few things, that I"m just not encouraged enough to say). You, in contrast, are like a book with seven hidden keys and you expect one to battle for some small details of this book (I remember when you wrote that you don"t like to read, that you find it boring. I hardly know anybody else being so open, so stringent and so self-confident in its judgement. But it is difficult to get such clear words from you a lot (o.k.,as an exception, your antipathy for german police-men was quite clear).
Today I saw something funny, when we were invited to a friends birthday (not really a party, rather a breakfast in a park about 100 km away). And there, a black-and-white cat (I think it was a male) appeared on the scene, which of course made our dog (a she) pretty nervous, because cats and dogs instinctively hate each other.
Our dog is usually a bit courious and wants to explore other creatures, so she got closer to the cat to check how he smells and if one can play with him. And as expected, the cat suddenly slapped her with the claws in his face. Ivo was crying a bit, but soon forget this attack. Meanwhile the cat was laying in the sun with his eyes closed. I think he was satisfied because he made clear that he can defend himself very well even if he was 3 times smaller. Now he allowed our dog to come closer, and at the end both were eating absolute peaceful food from the same pot. I"m sure, with some more time the two would have become un-separable. Would be amazing, if mankind would such easy settle its conflicts and fights.
Ghazal, you know what: You were wondering if there is a persian discotheque in Munich, and just by chance I found an advert for one going on today:
http://www.goruhesetareh.de/
It is a pitty its already too late now. But maybe there will be another one later this month or in August.
I have to apologize once again for this long mail. You are so much more efficient in saying the essentials in a few words. I»m very bad in this, perhaps it would sound blunt or naive. If I try, I would just say that I miss you a lot.
Wish you a relaxing night and funny dreams.
Take Care,
Michael
Did you had a nice day today? It was pretty hot, wasn"t it. Have you done something nice ? Could you enjoy the summer day ?
Did you recognise that the smell of the lime-trees (the ones we saw around the lake) is particular strong and long lasting this year ? I think this summer is special at all. I cant remember seeing the stars so clear and sparkling as this summer, I cant remember feeling the water of the lakes so smooth and tender and I never heard so much nice music as this summer. And of course I never before had the privileg to meet an angel being so inspiring and funny and mysterious as you are. In this respekt, we are quite different. I probably talk much to much (at least to you), and there is probably not much left that you might think is worth to hear. (Except for a few things, that I"m just not encouraged enough to say). You, in contrast, are like a book with seven hidden keys and you expect one to battle for some small details of this book (I remember when you wrote that you don"t like to read, that you find it boring. I hardly know anybody else being so open, so stringent and so self-confident in its judgement. But it is difficult to get such clear words from you a lot (o.k.,as an exception, your antipathy for german police-men was quite clear).
Today I saw something funny, when we were invited to a friends birthday (not really a party, rather a breakfast in a park about 100 km away). And there, a black-and-white cat (I think it was a male) appeared on the scene, which of course made our dog (a she) pretty nervous, because cats and dogs instinctively hate each other.
Our dog is usually a bit courious and wants to explore other creatures, so she got closer to the cat to check how he smells and if one can play with him. And as expected, the cat suddenly slapped her with the claws in his face. Ivo was crying a bit, but soon forget this attack. Meanwhile the cat was laying in the sun with his eyes closed. I think he was satisfied because he made clear that he can defend himself very well even if he was 3 times smaller. Now he allowed our dog to come closer, and at the end both were eating absolute peaceful food from the same pot. I"m sure, with some more time the two would have become un-separable. Would be amazing, if mankind would such easy settle its conflicts and fights.
Ghazal, you know what: You were wondering if there is a persian discotheque in Munich, and just by chance I found an advert for one going on today:
http://www.goruhesetareh.de/
It is a pitty its already too late now. But maybe there will be another one later this month or in August.
I have to apologize once again for this long mail. You are so much more efficient in saying the essentials in a few words. I»m very bad in this, perhaps it would sound blunt or naive. If I try, I would just say that I miss you a lot.
Wish you a relaxing night and funny dreams.
Take Care,
Michael
9.7.10
Nocturnal thoughts
Hi Ghazal my Dear,
It is always difficult for me to drop you at the end of the day in front of the guesthouse and drive away, but I think it is better for you to recover. I already exploited so much of your emotions during the evening. I hope, that it was not just me who enjoyed it (very egoistically, I have to admit), but that you also liked the few hours walking around and chatting.
I hope you sleep well, my dear
Michael
......................................................................
Hi Michael,
Thank you for showing me Munich. It was really nice. I like munich actually, but not the munich-police. thank you also for the stereo. havnt opened it yet. will open it tomorrow. take care and have a good night!
/ghazal
......................................................................
Thank you, Ghazal, for showing me the world with new eyes. It is strange, I"m always talking to much when we are together, as if I would know already everything. But in fact, later on I got the feeling that it was actually me who learnt much more from you.
If we both benefit from the time together, what can be bad about it ?
Sleep well , my dear
Michael
It is always difficult for me to drop you at the end of the day in front of the guesthouse and drive away, but I think it is better for you to recover. I already exploited so much of your emotions during the evening. I hope, that it was not just me who enjoyed it (very egoistically, I have to admit), but that you also liked the few hours walking around and chatting.
I hope you sleep well, my dear
Michael
......................................................................
Hi Michael,
Thank you for showing me Munich. It was really nice. I like munich actually, but not the munich-police. thank you also for the stereo. havnt opened it yet. will open it tomorrow. take care and have a good night!
/ghazal
......................................................................
Thank you, Ghazal, for showing me the world with new eyes. It is strange, I"m always talking to much when we are together, as if I would know already everything. But in fact, later on I got the feeling that it was actually me who learnt much more from you.
If we both benefit from the time together, what can be bad about it ?
Sleep well , my dear
Michael
7.7.10
Silent Message
Hi Ghazal,
Why are you so silent ? Are you such busy ? Or have I done something wrong ?
Send a short mail, please, so I know you are alright. Life is too short to be angry for more than 5 minutes, you know.
Have a nice evening, a relaxing night and a bright morning.
Yours Michael
...........................................................................................
Hi Michael,
No im not angry. i say that too, u should be happy cause life is too short.
so everything is fine with me, im just relaxing at home. will try and burn some music and then sleep.
the movie seems really good and sad. know my mum would want to see it, but u said its going only this week right? maybe i ask omid, maybe he wants to see it as well.
have a good night and see you tomorrow.
...........................................................................................
My dear Ghazal,
Sorry for answering too late, you are probably already asleep (it is half one in the morning). Just want to tell you how much I was relieved reading your message. I got so much used to read a few words from you in the evening, that I have problems finding peace if you don"t write.
It"s a nice idea to ask Omid for coming with us to the movies. He is a very educated and open-minded personality, and always thinks much deeper
than the rest of the mankind. I like him a lot, he very much reminds me of student-mates I met when I was at the university. They were from Jordan or from Africa. They were the most intelligent of all of us, they knew the real hard parts of physics (like quantum-mechanics and quantum-chromo-dynamics) from dreams. But on the same time, they had the broadest horizon of other interests, philosophy, psychology, arts, history, politics. It was always a pleasure to spend hours with them, and it never became boring. It always was sport, like exercises for our minds. What was particular amazing, that we had very often completely different views (for instance about the role of Israel, or what we thought should be the relation to girls), but we remained very respectful to each other, we even sort of loved each other (at least this is how I recall it). Omid is this sort of person, whom one always can trust 100%. For instance, if I once would have to leave a beloved girl with somebody to take care of her (((((maybe while I have to go to a conference for a week or into jail again ;-) ha ha ha, don"t worry, Ghazal, nobody will accuse you that your MSc thesis was supervised by a prisoner)))), I think I would ask Omid to look after her.
Sorry, my dear, I hope the incoming mail does not wake you up now that it is already 1 a.m.
Otherways, I hope you have a nice morning and can look forward onto a bright, nice day.
Michael
Why are you so silent ? Are you such busy ? Or have I done something wrong ?
Send a short mail, please, so I know you are alright. Life is too short to be angry for more than 5 minutes, you know.
Have a nice evening, a relaxing night and a bright morning.
Yours Michael
...........................................................................................
Hi Michael,
No im not angry. i say that too, u should be happy cause life is too short.
so everything is fine with me, im just relaxing at home. will try and burn some music and then sleep.
the movie seems really good and sad. know my mum would want to see it, but u said its going only this week right? maybe i ask omid, maybe he wants to see it as well.
have a good night and see you tomorrow.
...........................................................................................
My dear Ghazal,
Sorry for answering too late, you are probably already asleep (it is half one in the morning). Just want to tell you how much I was relieved reading your message. I got so much used to read a few words from you in the evening, that I have problems finding peace if you don"t write.
It"s a nice idea to ask Omid for coming with us to the movies. He is a very educated and open-minded personality, and always thinks much deeper
than the rest of the mankind. I like him a lot, he very much reminds me of student-mates I met when I was at the university. They were from Jordan or from Africa. They were the most intelligent of all of us, they knew the real hard parts of physics (like quantum-mechanics and quantum-chromo-dynamics) from dreams. But on the same time, they had the broadest horizon of other interests, philosophy, psychology, arts, history, politics. It was always a pleasure to spend hours with them, and it never became boring. It always was sport, like exercises for our minds. What was particular amazing, that we had very often completely different views (for instance about the role of Israel, or what we thought should be the relation to girls), but we remained very respectful to each other, we even sort of loved each other (at least this is how I recall it). Omid is this sort of person, whom one always can trust 100%. For instance, if I once would have to leave a beloved girl with somebody to take care of her (((((maybe while I have to go to a conference for a week or into jail again ;-) ha ha ha, don"t worry, Ghazal, nobody will accuse you that your MSc thesis was supervised by a prisoner)))), I think I would ask Omid to look after her.
Sorry, my dear, I hope the incoming mail does not wake you up now that it is already 1 a.m.
Otherways, I hope you have a nice morning and can look forward onto a bright, nice day.
Michael
Aliases for a lover
Finding an alias for a beloved person is like a mission impossible. Can love withstand such an operation, which takes away one of the integral parts of the beloved person - its name. One cannot liberately remove or exchange pieces from somebody you love, without damaging the feelings for this person. The name was one of the first to associate with this love, and this was even easier to recall than one of the details of the face or the stature. The exact form of her ears or the curvature of her eyes might be forgotten some time after she left, but the name Ghazal remains in his mind forever. Therefor, when he set himself the task to choose an alias name for her, to be used later in a book or an internet blog, he knew that he might easily fail or - at a later stage - rip the sheet with suggested alias-names into pieces. Too much was the love to the girl symbolized with her name GHAZAL, not least cause he probably spend more time writing her letters and e-mails and blog-articles than the few hours they were together physically. And these long nights during which he was engaged in imaginary dialogues with her, it was always her name that kept him bound. Ghazal, where are you, Ghazal, what are you doing, Ghazal, when will we see each other.
For this almost impossible task, he had to decide that the alias must bear the greatest possible similarity to her real name. Maybe just remove or change one or two letter, so it would turn to Azal, Chazal, Tazal or Sazal. In a next step, the changes could involve a simple permutation of two letters, which would give Salal or Sachal. Further changes would violate the feelings to the girl to much. Finally, he was most attracted to use the persian name "Azal", which strictly speaking means Honey. The girls real name, "Ghazal" had an uncomparable more poetic meaning - it stands for the gazelle, to which her swinging step always reminds her. But it is also used as a synonym for a "beloved, beautiful girl" and even describes the use of language, if one wants to express some very erotic feelings. From this transcendent term the name of a form of persian poetry is derived. As compared to this, Azal was much more prosaic, with its relation to some sweets that when you swallow them leafs back sticky fingers and a bitter after-tast. And in contrast to a beautiful ghazelle, Azal means donkey - at least in ancient irish language.
(from Wikipedia)
The ghazal not only has a specific form, but traditionally deals with just one subject: Love. And not any kind of love, but specifically, an illicit and unattainable love. The subcontinental ghazals have an influence of Islamic Mysticism and the subject of love can usually be interpreted for a higher being or for a mortal beloved. The love is always viewed as something that will complete a human being, and if attained will lift him or her into the ranks of the wise, or will bring satisfaction to the soul of the poet. Traditional ghazal love may or may not have an explicit element of sexual desire in it, and the love may be spiritual. The love may be directed to a man or a woman.
The ghazal is always written from the point of view of the unrequited lover whose beloved is portrayed as unattainable. Most often either the beloved does not return the poet"s love or returns it without sincerity, or else the societal circumstances do not allow it. The lover is aware and resigned to this fate but continues loving nonetheless; the lyrical impetus of the poem derives from this tension. Representations of the lover"s powerlessness to resist his feelings often include lyrically exaggerated violence. The beloved"s power to captivate the speaker may be represented in extended metaphors about the "arrows of his eyes", or by referring to the beloved as an assassin or a killer.
For this almost impossible task, he had to decide that the alias must bear the greatest possible similarity to her real name. Maybe just remove or change one or two letter, so it would turn to Azal, Chazal, Tazal or Sazal. In a next step, the changes could involve a simple permutation of two letters, which would give Salal or Sachal. Further changes would violate the feelings to the girl to much. Finally, he was most attracted to use the persian name "Azal", which strictly speaking means Honey. The girls real name, "Ghazal" had an uncomparable more poetic meaning - it stands for the gazelle, to which her swinging step always reminds her. But it is also used as a synonym for a "beloved, beautiful girl" and even describes the use of language, if one wants to express some very erotic feelings. From this transcendent term the name of a form of persian poetry is derived. As compared to this, Azal was much more prosaic, with its relation to some sweets that when you swallow them leafs back sticky fingers and a bitter after-tast. And in contrast to a beautiful ghazelle, Azal means donkey - at least in ancient irish language.
(from Wikipedia)
The ghazal not only has a specific form, but traditionally deals with just one subject: Love. And not any kind of love, but specifically, an illicit and unattainable love. The subcontinental ghazals have an influence of Islamic Mysticism and the subject of love can usually be interpreted for a higher being or for a mortal beloved. The love is always viewed as something that will complete a human being, and if attained will lift him or her into the ranks of the wise, or will bring satisfaction to the soul of the poet. Traditional ghazal love may or may not have an explicit element of sexual desire in it, and the love may be spiritual. The love may be directed to a man or a woman.
The ghazal is always written from the point of view of the unrequited lover whose beloved is portrayed as unattainable. Most often either the beloved does not return the poet"s love or returns it without sincerity, or else the societal circumstances do not allow it. The lover is aware and resigned to this fate but continues loving nonetheless; the lyrical impetus of the poem derives from this tension. Representations of the lover"s powerlessness to resist his feelings often include lyrically exaggerated violence. The beloved"s power to captivate the speaker may be represented in extended metaphors about the "arrows of his eyes", or by referring to the beloved as an assassin or a killer.
6.7.10
PhD project in Munich
Ghazal my dear,
I hope you have a pleasant evening and that you are not only standing in the kitchen. Be careful, if the swedish authorities see this, you will be punished for not following the official policy of womans emancipation. I keep my hope, that the people are more free in their decisions and understand, that doing something in the kitchen can be very pleasant as well. I like it, it has some relation to science and to lab-work, don"t you think so ?
Anyhow, I would also be very happy to know that you enjoy these few days and nights of warm and bright summer. May and June was so awful, always grey and cold and wet, that even myself (who has an atypical high level of serotonin, dopamin and melatonin) started to get signs of depression. However, there was always the hope to see you the next day, which was and still is the best remedy against sad emotions.
You are completely different, I know this, you have this potential deep inside of you to stop any influence from the outside and concentrate on thoughts and memories and dreams (you call them day-dreams, for me they are end-of-the-day dreams). Maybe you can switch your mind to the angels universe, I would not be surprised.
I think when I saw you the first time sitting in the front raw in the seminar room, you were in exactly this state. It was winter time, cold, wet, streets covered with mud, snow-flakes penetrating the space between neck and coat, shoes did not dry anymore and looked like on a 1st world war battle field. But there you were sitting and filling the seminar room with the aura of an oriental garden. Ghazal, who you think could resist this picture ? Whom you want to blame for immediately feeling the desire to follow you in this other world ?
Now at least the climate changed for the better. After work I always pass along a lake to go swimming. Later I spend the night in the garden and read or play some guitar. The only audience usually is our dog. The rest of the family sits inside and insists they don"t hear. In summer time, southern Germany can be a pleasant place. And winter time is also fine, with a lot of snow and clear sky. What is usually less pleasant are the few month in between.
Ghazal, maybe you consider doing your PhD in Germany. I think the competition is less strong than in Sweden. Talk to Iria or Olena, they will tell you that in Munich it is easy to live and have fun without knowing a lot of german. There are so many high-class institutes in Munich, the two Universities and the Max-Planck-Institutes and Helmholtz also has some very strong groups. And Sweden and Germany are virtually neighbours, only the Baltic Sea between them.
Oh, something else I have to ask you: I bought today this pink Panasonic MP3-player station (the one we looked at last Friday in the Electronic Super-Market).
It was by the way a unique product, something like a prototype. Therefore, I got it without a proper box. Only at home I found out that it is completely incompatible with my Hewlett-Packard Mp3-player. I therefore will give it to you tomorrow. And you keep it (at least till the end of your project), we already know it works perfectly with your IPod.
Sorry, that I wrote once again such an endless mail. And you might consider it complete nonsense.
Take Care
Michael
...............................................................................
hi michael,
no i dont stand in the kitchen, i dont like to cook.
you should maybe go inside and play for your family then:) but its nice to play for the dog as well i guess.
no i would want to go back to sweden. its better. i will be with my family. im not saying munich is a bad place. but home is always the best place.
you bought exactly the one we saw? why, i dont think your son likes it. but you should keep it. i use my computer and listen to music through it. but it was kind of you.
have a good night!! :)
/ghazal
................................................................................
Dear Ghazal,
You are right. I should more often ask you for your opinion before doing something. The MP3 players design does not suit our sons taste: He only accepts black stuff. He is at an age when boys are very concerned to appeare maskuline, and the slightest risk that somebody might think he loves girls stuff makes him mad (the player is pink, as you remember).
Take Care
Yours Michael
PS: I feel very sorry about the watch. You might think I broke my promise that it will work at the end. Now it appears, it does not. Instead, I only wrote you endless theories about time shifts and angels universe.
If you agree, I"ll open it once again.
Sleep well
I hope you have a pleasant evening and that you are not only standing in the kitchen. Be careful, if the swedish authorities see this, you will be punished for not following the official policy of womans emancipation. I keep my hope, that the people are more free in their decisions and understand, that doing something in the kitchen can be very pleasant as well. I like it, it has some relation to science and to lab-work, don"t you think so ?
Anyhow, I would also be very happy to know that you enjoy these few days and nights of warm and bright summer. May and June was so awful, always grey and cold and wet, that even myself (who has an atypical high level of serotonin, dopamin and melatonin) started to get signs of depression. However, there was always the hope to see you the next day, which was and still is the best remedy against sad emotions.
You are completely different, I know this, you have this potential deep inside of you to stop any influence from the outside and concentrate on thoughts and memories and dreams (you call them day-dreams, for me they are end-of-the-day dreams). Maybe you can switch your mind to the angels universe, I would not be surprised.
I think when I saw you the first time sitting in the front raw in the seminar room, you were in exactly this state. It was winter time, cold, wet, streets covered with mud, snow-flakes penetrating the space between neck and coat, shoes did not dry anymore and looked like on a 1st world war battle field. But there you were sitting and filling the seminar room with the aura of an oriental garden. Ghazal, who you think could resist this picture ? Whom you want to blame for immediately feeling the desire to follow you in this other world ?
Now at least the climate changed for the better. After work I always pass along a lake to go swimming. Later I spend the night in the garden and read or play some guitar. The only audience usually is our dog. The rest of the family sits inside and insists they don"t hear. In summer time, southern Germany can be a pleasant place. And winter time is also fine, with a lot of snow and clear sky. What is usually less pleasant are the few month in between.
Ghazal, maybe you consider doing your PhD in Germany. I think the competition is less strong than in Sweden. Talk to Iria or Olena, they will tell you that in Munich it is easy to live and have fun without knowing a lot of german. There are so many high-class institutes in Munich, the two Universities and the Max-Planck-Institutes and Helmholtz also has some very strong groups. And Sweden and Germany are virtually neighbours, only the Baltic Sea between them.
Oh, something else I have to ask you: I bought today this pink Panasonic MP3-player station (the one we looked at last Friday in the Electronic Super-Market).
It was by the way a unique product, something like a prototype. Therefore, I got it without a proper box. Only at home I found out that it is completely incompatible with my Hewlett-Packard Mp3-player. I therefore will give it to you tomorrow. And you keep it (at least till the end of your project), we already know it works perfectly with your IPod.
Sorry, that I wrote once again such an endless mail. And you might consider it complete nonsense.
Take Care
Michael
...............................................................................
hi michael,
no i dont stand in the kitchen, i dont like to cook.
you should maybe go inside and play for your family then:) but its nice to play for the dog as well i guess.
no i would want to go back to sweden. its better. i will be with my family. im not saying munich is a bad place. but home is always the best place.
you bought exactly the one we saw? why, i dont think your son likes it. but you should keep it. i use my computer and listen to music through it. but it was kind of you.
have a good night!! :)
/ghazal
................................................................................
Dear Ghazal,
You are right. I should more often ask you for your opinion before doing something. The MP3 players design does not suit our sons taste: He only accepts black stuff. He is at an age when boys are very concerned to appeare maskuline, and the slightest risk that somebody might think he loves girls stuff makes him mad (the player is pink, as you remember).
Take Care
Yours Michael
PS: I feel very sorry about the watch. You might think I broke my promise that it will work at the end. Now it appears, it does not. Instead, I only wrote you endless theories about time shifts and angels universe.
If you agree, I"ll open it once again.
Sleep well
5.7.10
Is this Love or just Confusion (J.Hendrix)
They both knew instinctively, that this innocent love-affair, starting at 4 p.m. after work and finishing not later than 9 p.m. when he dropped her at the guesthouse and went home to his family, could not go on for ever. It still was a summer love, the deepest that he had ever went through in his life, even if it remained innocent and spiritual. He would have been ready, however, to throw away everything that binds him to his established life. A single sign from her side showing that she wanted to carry on, and he would go with her wherever she wants. He felt during these two month that the tender feelings for her, even if they were on an verbal and undecided state, released so much creativity and energy, that he was amazed about the spirit that was resting in his mind for perhaps to long. This was probably what was meant by "All you need is love". It means simply: If you feel your soul dried out out and your mind longing for a challenge, the best thing to do is to fall in love.
Surely, deeper under this innocent love-affair with its talks, walks, and drives to lakes and castles and shopping-mals, there might have been the desire for more. The password that he choose for the blog was not by chance "Ghazals Orchid". He gave her this marvellous flower when they went at his birthday to the Gasteig, to register her for the German-Course. Than he just thought that the rosa-white orchid might be a nice decoration for her appartment. But today he was sure that already then, 10 days after they first met, deep inside he had some erotic phantasies with here. And "Ghazals Orchid" is perhaps a very easy to decipher code for a particular part of her body.
Evening Thunderstorm
Hi Ghazal, my dear,
I have absolute no theory on how an angel reacts during a thunderstorm. I can already see from here that lightnings struck in the north and west of Munich. Perhaps in Unterschleissheim it already gots very dramatic and noisy.
I hope you are alright. If you cannot sleep, write me a mail.
Take care, don"t be afraid, it is just a bit of electric over-charge. We both know, there is no angry god that tries to punish us. We are innocent.
Take Care,
Michael
..............................................................................................
hi michael,
i was just searching a bit on the internet and found something maybe interesting. u know im a bit confused what i want to do about my phd. i mean i like the project in sweden and love to go there. but im thinking a lot and want to know my other options. i always liked to work with breast cancer and then i saw this : "http://www.hugues-de-the-lab.net/En/S-Jauliac-homepage.html" and its in paris which is a plus. thought maybe u know about this place. u think i should contact him?
im not saying i dont want to do the phd in sweden. i just want to see all my options. and then choose the best one.
and if you know something else in paris i would like to know more.
i dont hear any thunderstorm yet. and im not scared usually when im inside:)
take care. and good night.
.............................................................................................
Hi Ghazal,
You are obviously one of the non-anxious angels - at least when it comes to thunder and lightning, but not if spiders, fishes and other creatures crosses your way.
Isn"t it strange, that I, who studied physics, is afraid of lightnings and of water, but that I don"t fear any wild creature, whereas you as a biologist get almost panik if a spider comes closer than 10 meters to you or a fish is swimmig in a lake, where you considered taking a bath ? But with absolut confidence to declare "not scared by the lightning and thunder". Logically, it should be the other way around, shouldn"t it. It would be good to combine the two areas where we are strong and fearless.
The group in Paris seems to do great science. It is for sure more innovative than radiation biology. I just could not find out whether the institute belongs to the University or to CNRS ? Do you know this ? This might determine whether they have a PhD program.
It would be nice if you could go there. I would be very happy to see you starting an exciting PhD project. But I will miss you a lot, of course, there is nothing and nobody that could fill the gap if you leave.
Sleep well and see you tomorrow
Yours Michael
I have absolute no theory on how an angel reacts during a thunderstorm. I can already see from here that lightnings struck in the north and west of Munich. Perhaps in Unterschleissheim it already gots very dramatic and noisy.
I hope you are alright. If you cannot sleep, write me a mail.
Take care, don"t be afraid, it is just a bit of electric over-charge. We both know, there is no angry god that tries to punish us. We are innocent.
Take Care,
Michael
..............................................................................................
hi michael,
i was just searching a bit on the internet and found something maybe interesting. u know im a bit confused what i want to do about my phd. i mean i like the project in sweden and love to go there. but im thinking a lot and want to know my other options. i always liked to work with breast cancer and then i saw this : "http://www.hugues-de-the-lab.net/En/S-Jauliac-homepage.html" and its in paris which is a plus. thought maybe u know about this place. u think i should contact him?
im not saying i dont want to do the phd in sweden. i just want to see all my options. and then choose the best one.
and if you know something else in paris i would like to know more.
i dont hear any thunderstorm yet. and im not scared usually when im inside:)
take care. and good night.
.............................................................................................
Hi Ghazal,
You are obviously one of the non-anxious angels - at least when it comes to thunder and lightning, but not if spiders, fishes and other creatures crosses your way.
Isn"t it strange, that I, who studied physics, is afraid of lightnings and of water, but that I don"t fear any wild creature, whereas you as a biologist get almost panik if a spider comes closer than 10 meters to you or a fish is swimmig in a lake, where you considered taking a bath ? But with absolut confidence to declare "not scared by the lightning and thunder". Logically, it should be the other way around, shouldn"t it. It would be good to combine the two areas where we are strong and fearless.
The group in Paris seems to do great science. It is for sure more innovative than radiation biology. I just could not find out whether the institute belongs to the University or to CNRS ? Do you know this ? This might determine whether they have a PhD program.
It would be nice if you could go there. I would be very happy to see you starting an exciting PhD project. But I will miss you a lot, of course, there is nothing and nobody that could fill the gap if you leave.
Sleep well and see you tomorrow
Yours Michael
4.7.10
What a trench-coat and a wrist-watch have in common
Ghazal, my dear, I”m sure you understoud right away why I did not want you to return your slowly running wrist-watch back to the shop for repair or replacement. Instead, I suggested doing the job myself, but not to safe some money.
Remember, you once told me that your mom stitched a rip in your trech-coat, what really struck me all of a heap. Now I very well understand why your mom wanted to do the job all by herself, Ghazal. I”m sure she did not want to hand-stitch your coat for any economic reason neither, she probably would be happy to buy a new trench-coat for you every year, if you want. What I assume drove her to take a needle and a thread and stitch your torned trench-coat herself was simply her love. She misses you, because you are far away, and by stitching your trench-coat she can materialize a bit of her love onto this piece of cloth that you might wear while beeing far from her. In our modern times, when emotions are mainly transmitted in an virtual manner and love, hate, sadness or anger are expressed virtually by SMS, telephon-calls, e-mail or twitter-tweets , I would say it is a very unique way how your mom tried to show her love to you. This way, she turned your trench-coat from an ordinary mass-produced good into something very unique and personal. The same way as an artist might give your house a unique, personal touch, your mother gave the coat a bit of her soul. Therefore, you have to cherish this coat from now on, don”t loos it somewhere, don”t throw it away, don”t give it to the poor when it gets old. Keep it with you, since it is loaded with your moms love and therefore it became very precious now. Unfortunately, your moms desire to building an imaginary link to her daughter by repairing her trench-coat, is not very common nowadays anymore. People rather prefer to throw stuff away and replace it with newly bought unpersonal goods. What your mom did shows this very rare example of mental aristocracy. And this, thanks god, has nothing to do with material wealth or with education, it has only to do with a deep understanding of the uniqueness of our life and our love.
.............................................................................................
hi michael,
im not yet sure of what i should present for my pecha kucha thing. but maybe i will present zartosht. but i can ask my family a lot so i dont need a book, but thank you for asking the man.
im glad that my watch works now!! thank you! thats really good news. its strange that the guy in the shop said that it will be a hard work to open the watch, that he had to send it to DKNY company to let them fix it. as u said, he only wanted the money probably.
yes my grandmum fixed my coat, and i really appreciate it. she always offers these things. she is great.
take care!
/ghazal
Remember, you once told me that your mom stitched a rip in your trech-coat, what really struck me all of a heap. Now I very well understand why your mom wanted to do the job all by herself, Ghazal. I”m sure she did not want to hand-stitch your coat for any economic reason neither, she probably would be happy to buy a new trench-coat for you every year, if you want. What I assume drove her to take a needle and a thread and stitch your torned trench-coat herself was simply her love. She misses you, because you are far away, and by stitching your trench-coat she can materialize a bit of her love onto this piece of cloth that you might wear while beeing far from her. In our modern times, when emotions are mainly transmitted in an virtual manner and love, hate, sadness or anger are expressed virtually by SMS, telephon-calls, e-mail or twitter-tweets , I would say it is a very unique way how your mom tried to show her love to you. This way, she turned your trench-coat from an ordinary mass-produced good into something very unique and personal. The same way as an artist might give your house a unique, personal touch, your mother gave the coat a bit of her soul. Therefore, you have to cherish this coat from now on, don”t loos it somewhere, don”t throw it away, don”t give it to the poor when it gets old. Keep it with you, since it is loaded with your moms love and therefore it became very precious now. Unfortunately, your moms desire to building an imaginary link to her daughter by repairing her trench-coat, is not very common nowadays anymore. People rather prefer to throw stuff away and replace it with newly bought unpersonal goods. What your mom did shows this very rare example of mental aristocracy. And this, thanks god, has nothing to do with material wealth or with education, it has only to do with a deep understanding of the uniqueness of our life and our love.
.............................................................................................
hi michael,
im not yet sure of what i should present for my pecha kucha thing. but maybe i will present zartosht. but i can ask my family a lot so i dont need a book, but thank you for asking the man.
im glad that my watch works now!! thank you! thats really good news. its strange that the guy in the shop said that it will be a hard work to open the watch, that he had to send it to DKNY company to let them fix it. as u said, he only wanted the money probably.
yes my grandmum fixed my coat, and i really appreciate it. she always offers these things. she is great.
take care!
/ghazal
3.7.10
Time Shift and Crystals
Ghazal, my dear,
what can I say ? Your watch indeed runs pretty slow. I opened it yesterday night to clean it (but of course it was extremely clean from the inside). Between midnight and now, 8 a.m., it lost again about 3 minutes.
When you told me your observation that it regularily looses about 15 minutes per day, I thought this indicates once again that you came here from another universe. Maybe you know the TV-serie "X-Files" with Agent Scully and Agent Moulder, who always find simple evidence that people like you and me come from outer space. I think both of them would like the idea that somebody with the potential to slow down a watch (if it is in close enough contact with its own pulse, like in your case) must come from another world (where, as we all know, time is running slower, the spiderman falls into love with a swan and people are born old to get younger every day).
But coming back to your watch, which I fully understand you want to have running with earth-compatible speed. Sure enough, you are also going to spend some more time here on earth, with no flight booked yet that will bring you back to your angels universe. I heard of cases, when Angels came here just for a short visit, and suddenly started to like the wild life in our world and decided to stay for longer.
Therefore, I will do my best today to set up your watch to +/- zero. I"ll put in a new battery, later we see. In case it still runs slow, I"m afraid nobody can help you and you would probably have to return it to the shop (in this other solar-system) and ask for replacement through warranty (you have not shown to me the warranty certificate: I guess it was issued from a shop not known here on earth !!! Something like "The Unified Reverse Time Company at Zartha").
But first, let me try to adjust it. We here on earth are good scientists and talented engineers, although we can not compete with you angels in terms of beauty and wisdom. Maybe I find a way to bring your clock-speed in synchronity with ours.
Have a nice and inspiring day, my dear.
Yours Michael
...............................................................................................
hi michael,
im fine, yesterday was a nice sunny day as today.
thank you for taking care of the watch. i think i should bring it to the shop in sweden. maybe they can fix it. or i just have to return it. haha no im just a normal girl living in the right time. just something wrong with the watch. :) you dont have to change batteries. i just have it until i go back to sweden or something. but really thank you for trying to fix it.
hope it was not too hard to take back the other bike to helmholtz. i would think its hard.
i will take a look at the trailer later.
take care!!:D
/ghazal
................................................................................................
Ghazal, my dear,
Of course every angel tries to insist he (or she) does not come from another star, but simply from a country a bit further north. O.k., I acknowledge that you learned some swedish to convince me of this. But maybe it was just enough to guide me through IKEA, explaining to me that "Ordin" means "order" and "Äpple" means "apple". I think I could learn this in a couple of days too. And what still makes me suspicious a lot are your blue eyes in combination with your dark hair. This, for sure is neither oriental nor scandinavian: this is celestial.
Now the latest news regarding your watch: I put in a fresh battery (guaranteed made here on earth), and have to say it seems to be 100% compatible with your extra-terrestrial DKNY watch. It runs nice and smoothly, and after 2 hours still without a second delay. I will leave it in for a couple of hours more, just to make sure it is stable. I just suspect, that your watch with its strong extraterrestrial energy has already influenced my watch at home, also causing this one to run slower now. Finally, both our watches now might run synchroneous, but are perhaps lagging behind normal earth clock-speed.
What would support this notions is the fact, that always when we have been together somewhere, like recently at IKEA or at the lake, in the coffe or just sitting with you in the car and driving the wrong way, I got the strange feeling that we were suddenly drifting into another time-zone, where everything is happening slower, but more intense. I would not say that it was an unpleasant feeling, it was just unusual. I think I could get used to it.
There is a second possibility to explain why the time around you runs 15 min slower per day. And this in fact has a scientific base, it is not a joke any more:
what can I say ? Your watch indeed runs pretty slow. I opened it yesterday night to clean it (but of course it was extremely clean from the inside). Between midnight and now, 8 a.m., it lost again about 3 minutes.
When you told me your observation that it regularily looses about 15 minutes per day, I thought this indicates once again that you came here from another universe. Maybe you know the TV-serie "X-Files" with Agent Scully and Agent Moulder, who always find simple evidence that people like you and me come from outer space. I think both of them would like the idea that somebody with the potential to slow down a watch (if it is in close enough contact with its own pulse, like in your case) must come from another world (where, as we all know, time is running slower, the spiderman falls into love with a swan and people are born old to get younger every day).
But coming back to your watch, which I fully understand you want to have running with earth-compatible speed. Sure enough, you are also going to spend some more time here on earth, with no flight booked yet that will bring you back to your angels universe. I heard of cases, when Angels came here just for a short visit, and suddenly started to like the wild life in our world and decided to stay for longer.
Therefore, I will do my best today to set up your watch to +/- zero. I"ll put in a new battery, later we see. In case it still runs slow, I"m afraid nobody can help you and you would probably have to return it to the shop (in this other solar-system) and ask for replacement through warranty (you have not shown to me the warranty certificate: I guess it was issued from a shop not known here on earth !!! Something like "The Unified Reverse Time Company at Zartha").
But first, let me try to adjust it. We here on earth are good scientists and talented engineers, although we can not compete with you angels in terms of beauty and wisdom. Maybe I find a way to bring your clock-speed in synchronity with ours.
Have a nice and inspiring day, my dear.
Yours Michael
...............................................................................................
hi michael,
im fine, yesterday was a nice sunny day as today.
thank you for taking care of the watch. i think i should bring it to the shop in sweden. maybe they can fix it. or i just have to return it. haha no im just a normal girl living in the right time. just something wrong with the watch. :) you dont have to change batteries. i just have it until i go back to sweden or something. but really thank you for trying to fix it.
hope it was not too hard to take back the other bike to helmholtz. i would think its hard.
i will take a look at the trailer later.
take care!!:D
/ghazal
................................................................................................
Ghazal, my dear,
Of course every angel tries to insist he (or she) does not come from another star, but simply from a country a bit further north. O.k., I acknowledge that you learned some swedish to convince me of this. But maybe it was just enough to guide me through IKEA, explaining to me that "Ordin" means "order" and "Äpple" means "apple". I think I could learn this in a couple of days too. And what still makes me suspicious a lot are your blue eyes in combination with your dark hair. This, for sure is neither oriental nor scandinavian: this is celestial.
Now the latest news regarding your watch: I put in a fresh battery (guaranteed made here on earth), and have to say it seems to be 100% compatible with your extra-terrestrial DKNY watch. It runs nice and smoothly, and after 2 hours still without a second delay. I will leave it in for a couple of hours more, just to make sure it is stable. I just suspect, that your watch with its strong extraterrestrial energy has already influenced my watch at home, also causing this one to run slower now. Finally, both our watches now might run synchroneous, but are perhaps lagging behind normal earth clock-speed.
What would support this notions is the fact, that always when we have been together somewhere, like recently at IKEA or at the lake, in the coffe or just sitting with you in the car and driving the wrong way, I got the strange feeling that we were suddenly drifting into another time-zone, where everything is happening slower, but more intense. I would not say that it was an unpleasant feeling, it was just unusual. I think I could get used to it.
There is a second possibility to explain why the time around you runs 15 min slower per day. And this in fact has a scientific base, it is not a joke any more:
Some years ago US scientists wanted to understand how much is our human 24-hours diurnal rhythm (that controls when we sleep, dream, wake up, eat, work, digest etc) determined by the day-night-cycle of the earth. To study this, they recruited about 50 volunteers, who agreed to live for a month in a building that was completely isolated from any sun-light. The volunteers could only use electric light, which they switched on and off when they wanted. So finally, after some weeks in this isolated environment, the entire group had adopted its own rhythm of inactivity (sleeping) and activity (beeing awake, working, playing etc.). What was strange: their own physiological rhythm was exactly 11 min slower than 24 hours. Therefore, when the experiment was finsihed after 7 weeks, the people inside the building were almost exactly 12 hours laggig behind the day-night-cycle outside the building. This means, that we still have our own biological clock build in, that runs per day 11 min slower than 24 hours. It is only the astronomic day- and night-changes, that synchronizes us to an exact 24hours rhythm. Without seeing the sun coming and going every 24 hours, we would all live a slightly longer day. The most likely explanation for this slower running biological clock inside our body was, that it developed already in primates about 1 million years ago. And 1 million years ago, the earth was indeed rotating approximately 11 min slower per day (because the gravitational force between earth and moon continiously fasten it up).
If we use this knowledge, and remember that your watch runs 15 min per day slower, we might conclude that you came here from the past, from approximately 1 273.645 years before.
In case you think this is all very academic, have a look at these two papers that shows how DNA-repair and radiosensitivity changes with círcadian rhythm or how disturbances of the later can even increase cancer-risk.
Sorry, my dear, if I start to confuse you. It is not really my intention to cause you any headache.
I met today on the flee-market a man fro Persia, who used to sell books. I wanted to get something about Zartoscht, in case you decide to do the Pecha-Kucha about this. The man said he has a few in persian, but they are not for sale, you could only try to borrow from him. He also has german ones, but than I would have to try to translate a bit. I think it would be an interesting subject for a short talk. And you could combine it with some contemporary musicians who had or have zoroastrian roots (Freddy Mercury of Queen and former general conductor of the Munich Symphony Orchestra, Zubin Mehta).
I think due to my own interest in this philosophy, I might help you to collect some material.
But you have to made up your own mind.
At the end, Ghazal, here comes something for you just to relax:
It is a tour through the Swarovski Cristal exhibition and performance and I am absolutely sure that you will like it (it is calm, probably also runs on a slower speed and therefor more suits your rhythm of life).
Take care, don"t condemn me, relax.
Michael
................................................................................................
Ghazal, my dear,
Hope you had a nice day. I wish you some interesting dreams. You might dream of your wrist watch. It runs since 2 p.m. without any delay. But maybe now you are sad hearing this? Maybe this 15 min delay per day was one of the last links that connected you to your former angels universe, Ghazal.
I willl keep the old battery (the one that makes the watch running slower). If you feel to much nostalgia, I can put it back into the watch for a day or so.
Yours Michael
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